


Not Another Coffee Shop AU

by electricjulia



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, Explicit Language, F/M, M/M, Strong language as is normal for college students
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-18
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-05-27 12:48:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 43,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6285118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/electricjulia/pseuds/electricjulia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Alternately titled Not Another College AU] Finn's sick of working for First Order of the Day, and starts working at La Résistance with Poe, as well as his old friend from the foster system, Rey. This does not make his ex-boss too happy, and when First Order starts losing customers (possibly because the staff is insane), Kylo Ren must go undercover to find a way to sabotage the competition. [Reylo and Stormpilot]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So here I am, writing a TFA fanfiction (when I should be continuing my other works…) And this was all I could come up with. God forgive me. There’s a lot of little details I’ve agonized over so I hope you don’t hate me for what I decided on. That being said, constructive criticism is welcome, and I hope you enjoy.

It was only three hours into the work day, and already, Finn was exhausted. He wiped his brow with a rag as he finally finished polishing the last of the silver tables at the café he worked at. First Order of the Day was a fairly large business, and there were quite a few black and metallic surfaces to polish—and Finn was the one to do this daily. But it was not his only job. He did basically any manual labor that needed to be done, as well as just take orders and occasionally make drinks. Now, noticing that nobody was free to work the cash register as customers started to line up, he rushed over to take on the task.

“Sorry about the wait, what would you like sir?” he asked, a little breathlessly, as an elderly customer with a white beard glanced over the menu.

“Er…just a small black coffee, please.”

“Alright, that’ll be $3.73.”

The man nodded and retrieved his wallet, but his brows furrowed as he fumbled through it. “Oh…oh dear, my wife must have taken my card with her when she went to the store yesterday….wait just a moment, I think I have…yes, here you go,” he said, thrusting out three one-dollar bills.

“You’re still short 73 cents, sir…” Finn said gently, cringing a little when the old man’s face wrinkled into a look of worry as he couldn’t seem to find any change from the raggedy wallet. Glancing around, the barista leaned forward, starting to go ahead and just hand the man his coffee anyway, but was interrupted by the familiar, brash voice of his co-worker, Phasma.

“What do you think you’re doing?” she demanded. Finn was by no means short, but the older woman towered over him easily, looking down at him with disapproval.

“It’s just a few cents, Phasma, come on….” Finn protested, but she was having none of it.

“Those few cents add up. The boss _will_ notice it, don’t think he won’t,” she said, her tone not malicious, but firm all the same. “Do you want to get fired?”

Finn was silent for a moment before starting to answer. “I…”

“What’s going on? Why is the line being held up?” Finn’s stomach flipped with dread as he heard another, much deeper voice now join in the already uncomfortable conversation. It was the manager, Kylo Ren. He was only a few years older than Finn and had absolutely no people skills to qualify him for such a job, and yet, he was still hired as the manager of this godforsaken place. Finn could only assume he was somehow related to the boss, but did not know as he had never actually seen the mysterious owner. Either way, Ren was definitely the worst out of all the unpleasant people Finn had to work with.

Reluctantly looking up to the pale, narrow face scowling at him, and then back at the anxious customer, Finn started to retrieve some change from his own wallet. “It’s alright, sir, I got it—“

But before Finn could do anything, and without any warning, Ren snatched the cup off the counter and flung it into the nearest sink. The sound of the impact was loud enough to cause everyone in the café to jump.

“We don’t need charity case customers who can’t pay for themselves,” he hissed at Finn before turning on the old man, whose jaw was still hanging open with shock. “Now get out!”

Finn, watching the humiliated customer scurry out the doors, clenched his fists at the irrational unfairness of it all.

_This is absolutely insane. Nobody should have to deal with this, day in and day out._

It only took a few seconds for him to muster up the strength to do what he’d been wanting to do for months.

“You know what, fuck this. I’m out,” he finally snapped, ripping off his First Order apron. Ren, who had started to stalk back to his office, whipped around to shoot him a scathing glare.

“What did you just say?”

“Fuck. This,” Finn repeated, his lip curled with disgust. “And fuck _you_. I quit.”

With that, he stormed out of the café, never to return again.

//

It did not take Finn long to find work elsewhere. In fact, it was another café, just across the street from his last job. La Résistance was much smaller and did not have as much fancy equipment as First Order of the Day, but it had a loyal clientele and a more comfortable air about it. Photos of various places and things lined the yellow walls. Little wooden tables and chairs were scattered around, of various shapes and sizes, all in decent condition but appearing as if they had been bought from a thrift store. In one corner was a chess table, a red armchair, and an orange couch. Everything was mismatched and yet it all helped to give the place a cozy, warm atmosphere.

As he walked in to ask if there were any jobs available, he was stunned to find he already knew someone there.

_“Rey?”_

The girl at the counter, a slender brunette with her hair in three loose buns, turned around with a look of confusion, before a smile of recognition spread across her face. “Finn?”

“I never thought I’d see you again!” he exclaimed, looking over her with wonder. The last time Finn had seen Rey, it was while he was still in the foster system as a fifteen year old kid. They had been in the same foster family for a couple of years. “How long has it been?”

She glanced behind her, making sure another coworker took over the cash register before she came out from behind the counter to embrace him. “Five years, I think,” she said before letting go. “So how are you doing? I mean, where did you end up?”

“I got adopted when I was sixteen,” he explained. “I’m doing pretty good. What about you?”

Rey’s eyes shifted towards the floor as she gave a little shrug. “Well, I grew out of the system. But you know, I’m fine, I’m able to support myself and everything…” Quickly changing the subject, she looked back up at him, forcing a smile. “So are you just visiting town or…?”

“Oh no, I’m a student here at Starkiller.”

“Me too! Wow, out of all the universities…”

“And all the cafés,” he added with a small smile, trying not to stare too much. “I don’t know how I haven’t seen you before around here. I’ve been working just across the street for a few months…”

“With the enemy?” she said, crossing her arms with a teasing smirk. “How was that?”

Biting his lip, his first instinct was to lie and say it wasn’t so bad, but this was Rey. He had always been honest with her, even if it wasn’t always polite.

“It was horrible. My manager was a dick. Everyone kinda was, actually, but I mean he was absolute batshit—anyway, I just couldn’t stand it anymore.”

“Hm. I heard the staff was a bit rude, but I didn’t know it was that bad.”

“Yeah…I uh…was actually hoping to get a job here now…” As he said this, Rey’s eyes lit up.

“Really? That would be awesome! We do need some more help around here…” she said, looking back to the coworker who had taken over at the counter. “Hey, Poe! Can you get Finn an application and show him around?”

Poe was a classically handsome young man with dark hair, a healthy tan, and a somewhat mischievous look about him. He flashed a stunning smile as he unabashedly looked Finn up and down before waving him over. “Of course. Come on, newbie.”

The first place Poe lead Finn was to an office in the back. Opening the door without knocking, Finn found himself looking at someone who was likely to be his next boss.

“Finn, this is Madame Boss Lady. Madame Boss Lady, this is Finn.”

“It’s Leia, and you’re lucky we’re even on a first name basis, Poe,” muttered the older woman as she stood up from her desk, a hand on her hip. Glancing over Finn, she continued, “I assume you want a job?”

“Yes ma’am,” Finn nodded quickly. Leia chuckled a little at his eagerness. “Well by all means, I’m sure I can find something for you to do…”

As they walked out of the office, a framed photo on Leia’s desk caught Finn’s eye. He only saw it for a moment but could instantly register that it was a graduation picture, and the person in it was…

 _Is that…?_ He thought, trying to glance back to get another look, but the door had already shut. Even so, he knew exactly what he saw. He’d recognize that long nose and mop of black hair anywhere.

_No fucking way…_


	2. Chapter 2

Finn's first day at work went rather well, especially considering the deplorable conditions he was used to. His job involved a lot less cleaning, for one thing. Whenever he made a mistake, he was corrected gently by Rey or Poe, rather than being screamed at. Even the boss, Leia, made him feel more like a welcome guest rather than some lowly serf. In short, he felt like a huge weight had been lifted off his chest.

As night fell, Rey locked up and stepped out onto the sidewalk, shivering in the cold night air as she was followed outside by Finn and Poe.

"Well guys, I have to go this way, so…" Rey trailed off, motioning towards the campus, then approached Finn to give him a hug.

"I'm glad I got to see you again."

Closing his eyes as they embraced, he smiled. "It was great seeing you again too," he murmured before she slowly pulled away.

Rey nodded, now glancing between him and Poe. "Well…I'll see you both tomorrow, I guess. Have a good night!"

As he watched her go, Finn was revisited by a brief memory of the last time he had said goodbye, back at their old foster home. Ever since he first met her, he'd been fighting his feelings for her—not just because he felt a little out of her league, but also because they both knew their stay together was temporary. That family never cared about either of them. Soon, they'd be separated and never see each other again (or so he thought, at the time). But on that last day, when they were to be split up into different homes, he decided he had nothing to lose. Finn remembered his fifteen year old self, clumsily leaning in for a kiss, and Rey, nervously turning away before giving him a brief hug and walking away. Neither of them said anything about it then, and apparently, they weren't going to say anything about it now. It was just a teenage crush after all. But even after all this time, those fleeting feelings returned all too easy.

"You are _super_ transparent, you know."

Turning to Poe sharply, Finn felt the heat rise in his cheeks. "What?"

"You have a crush on her." As Finn started to protest the accusation, Poe just shook his head. "Come on, man. I'm not going to tell her or anything, don't worry."

Knowing this, Finn relaxed a little. "Alright, alright…well...you gotta tell me then, what are my odds? Does she have a boyfriend?"

"Or a girlfriend?" Poe suggested wryly, snickering when Finn's eyes widened. "I'm just messing with you. Nah, she's single. Has been, ever since I've known her."

"Oh good. And _you_ don't...you know, like her?"

Poe laughed a little at this, making Finn feel like he was missing out on some sort of inside joke. "Not like that. She's not my…type."

Finn breathed a sigh of relief hearing this. As they walked on down the street, talking mostly about Rey, work, and school, they became so wrapped up in their conversation that almost an hour passed before they finally parted ways.

/

Rey's first class of the day was history. It was one of the last remaining required courses she had to take before settling into her Engineering major. Honestly, she didn't know why history of all things was a required course for everyone, but she was pretty good at it. The tests were easy, anyway, as they all came from the lectures, and Professor Skywalker was decently engaging—when he was there, that is.

Half the time, an unpleasant GTA (whose name nobody was really sure of) had to take his place. The guy couldn't have been more than thirty, and spoke in muttering, uneven tone like a rambling teenager, but seemed to love taking on the role of a superior. Nobody dared to do anything aside from listen and quietly write notes while he lectured, lest they be subject to a humiliating outburst. Somehow, the bitter grad student always ended up on a tangent about some war or another and how the professor should have included the other side of the story—thus, he never ended up finishing what should have been covered that day.

To make matters worse, everyone had to write three papers throughout the semester, with several, very strict requirements. Wanting to do the best she could, Rey spent weeks perfecting her first paper, and actually managed to make an A+. But with the second paper, she was starting to feel a bit less motivated.

On the day papers were to be handed back, she glanced over at the guy next to her, trying to see what grade he got. The student in question was usually asleep or on his phone during class (at least when the more lenient Skywalker was teaching), so she was expecting a C or below. This was not the case.

_Wow. A 'B'. I must have aced this then.. I wish I hadn't wasted so much time with all those references on my first paper…typical, teachers always talk a big game but still go easy on you when it comes down to it…_

When her paper was finally returned to her, Rey's smile instantly fell.

It was a 'D'.

The shameful letter was scribbled up on the corner, in bright red marker. But as she flipped through the pages, she didn't find any comments or suggestions for improvement, until the very end.

" _Try harder." That's it? Seriously?_

She stewed for the rest of class, agonizing over what she had done wrong. Yes, she only wrote it in one night, but she had looked over it and honestly, it looked passable. She'd gotten A's on worse papers before, albeit in different classes. What did that even mean, "try harder?"

When class was over, she almost pushed past people to get to the smaller of the two desks at the front of the room, knowing damn well she'd be wasting her time with Skywalker. Like most professors, he left all the grading to his GTA.

Rey's eyes narrowed as she approached the sullen, black-clad figure. He was leaned back in his seat, apparently engrossed in something on his phone. He didn't even bother to look up when Rey was right in front of him.

Practically slamming her paper down in front of him to get his attention, the undergrad started to speak in an agitated tone. "Okay, I usually don't complain about my grades, but I have to say something, because I don't think this was deserved. Why did you give me a D on this paper?"

The grad student sighed with annoyance as he put down his phone, his dark eyes shifting slowly from the paper up to Rey.

"Because it was shit. Enough said."

Taken aback by his rudeness, Rey clenched her jaw, already feeling her blood begin to boil. "Wow. Really? Because the guy sitting next to me is barely passing and he got a much better grade. I saw his paper, you circled the errors all over it but still gave him a B. I mean, I know you're just a GTA but aren't you supposed to be impartial?"

"I don't know which student you're referring to, since there's about a hundred people in this class period alone. In any case, I didn't give you this grade because of some personal vendetta. I just know you can do better than this."

Rey stepped back blinking, unsure what to say for a moment. She didn't expect him to know which student she was talking about, but….

"If there's so many people in this class that you can't remember, how do you know that I, _personally,_ can do better?"

The GTA hesitated to answer, his eyes shifting about the room and his fist clenching slightly on his desk. "You started off with a really well thought out paper. One of the best I've seen. But this one…you obviously half assed it. You barely scratched the surface of the subject. Like I said: try harder. That's all I can say."

Rey continued to stare at him, shifting restlessly as she was still unsatisfied with this response. "So I just have to accept this and let it drag my overall grade down?"

The grad student was silent for a moment, seemingly in deep thought for what felt like forever to Rey. Finally, he leaned forward, lowering his voice. "Fine. I'll let you redo it, if you want. But it has to be done by the end of the week, and don't give me some high school level bullshit..."

Hardly expecting someone like this to do any favors for her, Rey had to physically keep herself from smiling too hard at the pleasant surprise. "Okay, I'll do that. Thank you so much," she said, and started to walk off when his hand caught her arm, startling her. As soon as she stopped and looked back at him with a suspicious glare, he immediately released her.

"This is just a one-time deal, so don't go telling people about it, alright?" he quickly explained, keeping his voice at a whisper. "I'd really prefer to grade each person's paper only once."

"Okay, I won't, don't worry," she nodded, pausing a second this time to make sure he was finished before walking off again. As she headed to her next class, she found herself absentmindedly rubbing the place on her arm where he had grabbed her.

_That was…weird._

/

It was a slow Sunday evening at La Résistance. Most of the workers weren't scheduled, and Leia took weekends off. Rey's shift had ended an hour ago, leaving Finn completely alone. No customers had come in for hours, so he had half a mind to close up shop early. Reaching for the keys in his pocket, he almost caught them when he fumbled, and they fell out onto the floor with a loud jangle. Sighing, he bent down to retrieve them, then rose back up.

Finn nearly jumped out of his skin as he was suddenly face to face with his former boss.

"Hello, traitor."

"What the hell are you doing here?" Finn demanded. _How did I not hear him come in?_

"Didn't take long to find you," Ren sneered, pushing a lock of black hair out of his eyes and glancing around with a disdainful scoff. " _Here,_ really?"

"Anywhere's better than working with you, prick," Finn snapped back defensively. As he realized something, a smug grin crossed his face. "Even if it is with your _mom."_

Ren froze up and his face paled slightly as Finn pressed on, the latter of the two clearly enjoying how the tables had turned.

"Yeah, nice graduation picture, by the way. Blue isn't really your color though." Finn tilted his head, leaning on the counter. "Should I go get Leia so you two can chat?"

Ren rolled his eyes impatiently. "Don't bother lying, we both know she's not here to defend you. Nor are any of your friends…what a coincidence..."

_What, did he memorize everyone's schedules just to catch me alone?_ Finn wondered incredulously, but kept up a blasé façade.

"Are you seriously trying to threaten me right now? What are you going to do, beat me up?"

Snorting at the suggestion, Ren shook his head and stepped away, giving the room another sweeping glance. "Don't flatter yourself, you aren't worth the trouble. I just came here to see if this place was still as pathetic as ever. It is. And it suits you."

Turning to leave, he was almost out the door when he turned back to mention one more thing.

"Oh, tell Rey I said hello."


	3. Chapter 3

At around 9 PM, the lights at First Order went off. A few minutes later, a black 1973 Mustang pulled out of the parking lot and turned onto the street, grunge music obnoxiously blaring from inside. In the driver's seat, Kylo Ren barely paid attention to the road as his hands turned the wheel mechanically, having driven this path back to his apartment the same time almost every night for the past few years. It was a rare time that he ever had anywhere else to go.

After the day's events, there was much on his mind. Like how that morning he had looked outside only to spot Finn across the street, in uniform and going in to work at La Résistance. Honestly, it shouldn't have taken Ren this long to figure it out, it was only fitting that a traitor would start working for the competition. At first, it was just _how_ Finn had quit, what he had said to him in front of everyone, which infuriated Ren. But now that Finn was working for his mother, and had the nerve to mock him about it…It was enough reason for Kylo to consider slashing his tires. Unfortunately, it looked like Finn didn't even own a car.

_But of course he just had to work with_ her. _She acts like she already knows him. Probably does. And from what I've seen, he's all too happy to cozy up to her what with all the smiling and hugging and-_

Shaking his head quickly, he turned up the volume of the music in an attempt to drown out his thoughts. They weren't useful or productive, and he just wanted to relax after a long day at work. But his mind wouldn't shut up. That is, until he finally made it to his apartment, and stepped inside.

In the living area, his two coworkers/roommates, Hux and Phasma, seemed to be having an obnoxious get-together with Hux's pretentious frat boy friends. They seemed to be playing some kind of drinking game to a TV series, but were mostly talking and laughing so loud the show could barely be heard.

_This is the last thing I need right now…_

Without an invitation, Kylo snatched the bottle of Jack Daniel's off the coffee table, taking a huge swig before setting it back down on the glass with a clank. He locked eyes with Hux, who wrinkled his nose with distaste.

"Really, you couldn't pour a glass?"

Ignoring him as he usually did, Kylo trudged back towards his room. "Turn the TV down, I have to get up early in the morning."

"Uh, yeah, so do we, we work at the same place remember?!" Phasma called after him, just as he slammed and locked his door. His voice was muffled as he shouted back furiously.

" _Just keep it the fuck down!_ "

Collapsing on the black sheets of his unmade bed, Kylo dully tried to remember a time when his life wasn't like this day in and day out. It must have been sometime his junior year, when the university required that he choose a major or leave. He'd picked history. A stupid choice to many, about as frowned upon as an art degree, but at least it was something he really cared about. His mother had always pressured him to go into something like political science or law. His dad, of course, wanted him to major in engineering like himself. Neither option really appealed to him.

" _History? Are you serious? You can only do one thing with that, Ben. All you can do is teach."_

" _And that's what I'm planning on doing, Dad. You're a professor, I thought you'd be happy that I'm following in your footsteps."_

" _Yeah, but I teach something worthwhile, what you're wanting to do is just…"_

Screwing his eyes shut, Kylo tried not to think about the rest of that memory. All that mattered now was that things were different. He didn't have to deal with _them_ anymore. He'd managed to force himself out of their grip, pay for everything he needed with his own money (albeit, his full ride scholarship helped a lot in that aspect), and continue life on his own. No one even knew he was related to the highly overrated Professor Solo. Thank God for government approved name changes.

But it was hard to support oneself only working at a coffee shop—even if it did pay better than his mother's tacky little café. As it turned out, getting a job as a GTA was a bit difficult without the help of family. It seemed most professors didn't want an assistant with his…"attitude". So, begrudgingly, he resigned himself to working with his uncle Luke. It was obvious Professor Skywalker was only doing this for his sister's peace of mind, but at least he never spoke to Kylo unless it was necessary for work. That was all he could ask for.

As he lay in bed, trying to ignore the continuing noise out in the living room, he was starting to feel a hint of a buzz as the whiskey settled in his brain. It helped him to finally relax a little, but also loosened the harsh filter he had set on his thoughts.

_Did I do the right thing with that grade…it got her attention alright, but not exactly the kind I wanted…that was stupid of me. It was just really disappointing, seeing that someone, for once, actually listened to what_ I _said in class, not just what was on Luke's absurdly biased lecture slides. But then afterwards, she just didn't even…whatever. I mean, I'm actually teaching her, not just letting her get by with minimal effort…I did her a favor. Two favors, if you count letting her write the paper again…_ Turning over on his side, he curled up around one of his pillows as his thoughts continued to meander without restraint. _I should talk to her outside of class. I'm sure after this, she'll have a lot of interesting thoughts like she did on her first paper. Unfortunate, since that class is for non-majors. Maybe I can convince her to switch to history…Or switch jobs. Either one. Or both. Both is good…_

_/_

Poe was already in a chipper mood as usual, but whenever Finn came in for work, his smile brightened just a little bit more. After a few days of getting to know each other, he'd learned all about Finn leaving First Order. He'd never worked there personally, but he had been inside, and had seen what kind of barbaric nonsense went on. One time, the manager and assistant manager got into a fight nearby Poe's table, and ended up spilling coffee all over his lap. He was lucky the drink was iced instead of hot. But he also saw how the lesser workers were intimidated by their superiors, and thus, admired Finn for having the guts to do what he did.

Knowing it would just be the two of them at the café today, Poe was a bit more eager in greeting his newest coworker as he came through the door.

"Hi, Finn!"

"Hi…" Finn acknowledged him, but glanced around in confusion. "Where's Rey?"

Poe's expression fell a little at the mention of her name. He liked Rey a lot, but it seemed like she was all Finn could talk about sometimes. "She said she couldn't come in today, had to do research on some paper or whatever…"

"Oh." Finn looked down, clearly disappointed.

"I'm sure she'll be back tomorrow," Poe assured him. "So, how was closing up last night? Sorry we had to leave you all alone there, I hope you didn't have any trouble with the lock, sometimes it can be a little tricky…"

Noticing how Finn's body had tensed slightly, Poe fell silent, glancing over him worriedly. "Did something happen?"

Finn quickly shook his head, pretending to be quite occupied with wiping off the counter. The other man raised a brow dubiously. "Are you sure..? Like I said, you're kinda transparent."

"What, are you a psychology major or something?" Finn muttered, furiously scrubbing the rag over a spot that just wouldn't disappear.

"Professional Flight Management, actually," Poe beamed. "It doesn't take a genius to tell something's bothering you."

Sighing in defeat, Finn finally turned to face Poe. "Fine. The freak from across the street decided to pay me a visit when everyone here was gone."

When the other man's eyes widened, the younger of the two continued hurriedly. "Nothing serious happened, he was all talk, it's just…he said something like 'tell Rey I said hello'…"

_Her. Again._

"It seemed a bit sketchy. I mean, does he know her?" Finn asked, the concern evident in his eyes. Poe shrugged.

"No idea. I only saw him that one time and she's never said anything about him. But who knows, I mean, I don't know much about her life. Just ask her if you're worried."

After a few minutes of taking orders and preparing drinks, Finn decided to take this advice. He'd gotten Rey's number the first day he showed up at La Résistance, but this was the first time he'd dared to text her. With a deep breath, he started to type out : _"Hey Rey, this is Finn. This probably sounds weird but you know a guy named Kylo Ren?"_

/

Across campus, Rey was huddled up in a lonely dorm room, typing and erasing feverishly on her university-supplied laptop. Books were stacked everywhere, forming a sort of academic fortress around her. But her work was interrupted by an unexpected buzz from her iPhone. Opening the new message, Rey's brows furrowed in puzzlement after reading the text from Finn.

"Who the bloody hell is Kylo Ren?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally caught up posting what I've already written a few days ago. Obviously, updates will be less frequent now, but hopefully not by much. Thanks for the kudos and stuff. As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

First Order of the Day was never very crowded, except for on game days when tourists swamped nearly every establishment in town. But after Finn quit, forcing the manager to actually service customers alongside Hux and Phasma until they found a replacement, less and less people frequented the café.

"Come on, it's not as if Finn was that good…" Kylo muttered to himself as he drummed his fingers on the counter, bored to death after an hour had gone by without a single customer to harass. Nearby, Hux, who was putting up a "Now Hiring" flyer, let out a harsh laugh.

"No, you're just that bad."

"Shut up, you aren't much more pleasant yourself."

Narrowing his eyes, Kylo continued staring out the window towards the enemy establishment, watching bitterly as flocks of people crowded inside La Résistance. His stomach tied up in knots just thinking about how much money was going to be taken out of _his_ paycheck when the boss learned that they were getting next to zero customers.

Deciding to look at his phone instead was not a better idea. Curiosity demanded that he once again, open the Pandora's box that was the Yelp app, and look at the reviews for First Order of the Day.

" _Really really good coffee, but horrible service."_

" _Overpriced."_

" _Decent. Try La Résistance instead."_

" _Workers are very rude. One said my drink was 'too complicated' and demanded I change it to something simpler."_

" _DO NOT GO HERE. THE STAFF IS INSANE."_

Kylo cringed at that last review, huffing indignantly as he looked back outside. The street was not very wide, and both cafés had large windows, so he could see almost everything happening inside La Résistance. Rey and Finn were working alongside each other, him taking orders as she prepared drinks. They seemed to be having a nice little chat, smiling and laughing, with each other as well as a few customers they seemed to know. It was a sickeningly quaint sight.

_I wonder what that's like, not wanting to strangle your coworker every time he speaks,_ thought Kylo with a side-eye glance towards his ginger comrade. _Or your customers, for that matter. What exactly is their secret, anyhow? Do they put cocaine in the coffee or something?_

After a few minutes of ruminating in his own jealousy, he got up and started towards the door with a look of determination.

"Where are you going?" Phasma asked.

"I'm going to see what all the hype is about," he said simply, stepping outside and jogging across the street. _I've never even tried Mom's coffee…God, I hope she isn't there._

Strolling inside La Résistance, Kylo Ren's presence immediately put a damper on the cheery atmosphere—at least for the workers who knew him. At the cash register, Finn was whispering something to Rey and motioning towards Kylo, failing miserably at being discrete. Whatever he said instantly caused Rey to shoot a disgusted glance in Ren's direction. Kylo pretended like he didn't see this.

As he waited at the back of the long line, he soaked in his surroundings, paying special attention to the menu. There was quite a variety of choices, but it wasn't overwhelming. Pretty much every option _sounded_ good. But was it really? When at last it was his turn to order, he could barely get a word out before Finn aggressively went on the defense.

"What the hell are you doing here _again_? Got some more vague threats to dish out? You know, I will not hesitate to—"

Kylo was all too eager to overplay the part of an innocent victim, of course.

"Is it so unthinkable that perhaps I just want a drink?"

Finn scoffed. "As if. What do you want?"

"An iced macchiato, actually."

"No, what do you _really_ want?" Finn growled, not buying his act for an instant, but Rey put a hand on his shoulder.

"Just go ahead and take his order, he's going to hold up the line all day if you argue. If he wants to spend his money here, fine. More business for us," she said, purposefully avoiding eye contact with Ren as she headed back to the espresso machine. Discontented with being ignored, Kylo shifted over towards her end of the counter.

"How's that paper coming along?"

"Fine," she replied curtly, not even turning to look at him.

"I hope you come up with something that surprises me. If you do, I might mention it next time I have to lecture. And credit you, of course."

Now having to turn around to find the creamer for the macchiato, she only gave him a brief, disdainful glance. "I'd really rather you didn't."

"You don't want the recognition?"

"Not from you."

Feigning ignorance, he decided to continue his banter, never knowing when to quit. "You seem upset. Did Finn here happen to say anything about me?"

"Aside from you being a jackass with serious anger issues and a superiority complex, no, not really. But I already kind of figured that from class," she mused bitterly, scribbling something on the cup before practically shoving his drink across the counter to him. "There, happy?"

Looking down at his cup, he appeared quite unamused as he read what she wrote as his "name".

_Kile Lorin_

"Are you serious?" he deadpanned, pointing to the misspelled mess. She gave a little smirk and a shrug.

"Sorry, I guess your name is too _edgy_ for me."

Gritting his teeth, he finally turned on his heel to leave. He was going to return to First Order, but thinking better of bringing La Résistance merchandise into his own workplace, he decided to finish his drink at one of the tables inside. Naturally, he chose to stretch out out on the huge, out-of-place armchair in the corner so that he could watch everything that went on behind the counter. Rey continued to pretend he didn't exist, simply working. She barely said anything even as Finn continued to rant to her, likely still angry about Ren being there. Every so often, Finn shot him a look of murderous intent, but Kylo only returned it with a smug grin.

Sipping on the macchiato at last, he was surprised at the flavor. Not too sweet, as he had expected, but there was something there he couldn't quite place. No matter how long he thought on it, he couldn't figure out what exactly it was that made it so good. As he finished it, he decided to approach Rey one last time to give his compliments.

"I have to say, it wasn't too bad. Good job."

Rey raised a thin brow and shook her head, continuing to work mechanically as she spoke. "Why not tell that to your _mom_ instead? She's the one who came up with the recipes, after all."

The look of sheer horror on Kylo's face when he realized Finn had told Rey one of his biggest secrets was positively priceless.

_That's it. Tires will_ _be slashed._

/

As it turned out, Finn, in fact, did not own a car. Nor even a bicycle, or anything else with wheels that could be torn to pieces. So it seemed that all of Kylo's following and lurking around Finn's apartment had been a huge waste of time.

Driving back towards his own apartment after realizing his grand revenge scheme was not so brilliant after all, he started to feel that familiar itch as his breathing became shaky and his fist slammed against the dashboard in frustration. He needed an outlet. Now.

He had wanted to take it all out on Finn, but being unable to do that now left him feeling even more unstable. There were very few things he could use to channel his anger that actually satisfied him without getting arrested.

_I should have just thrown a brick through his window…if I had one, anyway._

As he drove through campus, he suddenly spotted the rec center, and veered into the parking lot without thinking. It was already past ten at night, but the lights were still on inside the building.

_This will just have to do._

He'd only been to this place once, maybe twice before as an undergrad. But there were always so many people. He found it impossible to get anything done properly when he felt like he was being watched. But now, with it being such a late hour, he hoped he could at least find one corner of the building that was unoccupied.

Stepping inside the lobby, he had to retrieve his wallet and swipe his university ID to gain entrance to the main exercise room. Of course, there were still a few people vigorously training at the lifting machines and treadmills, all in sickeningly peak condition.

_Overachievers._

Quickly shifting out of this room, he wandered aimlessly until he found a sign that caught his attention: Boxing. Finally. All he really wanted to do was punch something, after all. As he opened the door, however, he found that even this room was occupied. His first instinct was to leave, until he saw exactly who was beating the hell out of a punching bag in the corner.

"Rey?"

She whirled around in surprise, her fists remaining raised to defend herself. Her face was flushed from exertion and a few droplets of sweat clung to her brow. With her teeth bared and rage in her eyes, she looked positively animalistic as she accosted him.

" _You_ again? Are you stalking me? You know, I thought Finn was just overreacting when he suggested it, but I'm starting to believe him…"

"I swear, I had no idea you would be here," he explained sincerely, trying not to look at how her white tank top clung to her body. "Besides, if I _were_ stalking you, it looks like I would have picked the wrong person to mess with."

"Yeah, you would have."

Kylo looked down at the floor and sighed. "Look, I just came here to let off some steam, but if you want me to go, I will."

When he started back towards the door, Rey's eyes softened, and after some hesitation, she stopped him. "It's fine, you can stay if you want. It's a public space."

Kylo raised a brow as he turned back around. He hardly expected her to say that, when she was clearly still pissed at him. Then again, she had always seemed a little more mature and level-headed, despite whatever her personal feelings were—like at the café the other day.

Removing his jacket and scarf, he cleared his throat, uncomfortable with the silence. "Well, we can stay at either end of the room and ignore each other, or if you want, we can uh…spar. You know, take it out on me."

Rey raised a brow suspiciously. "Are you some kind of masochist?"

"No, I just know it feels better hitting whatever you're angry at rather than a random object," he shrugged. "But it's your choice."

After a moment of thinking, she cracked her knuckles and stepped closer to him. "Well, if you want to be hurt so bad, I'd be happy to oblige."

He looked away from her for only a moment, wondering if there were any gloves or other protective gear, when she suddenly hit him in the shoulder. It wasn't very hard, but it was enough to stun him for a second.  
Taking a step back, he chuckled. "You're wanting to go all bare-knuckle boxing with this, I see."

"You don't have padding in the real world," she said simply, then swung a fist towards him again. This time, he caught her wrist in his hand, making her struggle a little bit before letting go. Holding up his palms, he said, "Why don't you just aim for my hands for now?"

He barely felt the first couple of hits. Rey looked very determined but her fists didn't seem to be obeying her. Shaking his head, Kylo laughed a little under his breath at her efforts.

"You can do better than that—ow!"

Cringing, he rubbed his hand gingerly as it throbbed slightly. It felt like she hit a nerve near his thumb. Looking back up, he saw she had a little satisfied grin on her face.

"Are you some kind of sadist?" he asked, mocking her earlier question. She crossed her arms.

"Only when I'm hurting someone who deserves it," she replied. Narrowing her eyes, she glanced over him slowly. "Why did you mention me to Finn?"

Kylo quickly looked away from her, biting his lip as he tried to think of a good excuse. "I just…I don't know, I wanted him to know I knew you. That's it. I didn't really intend for him to tell you anything about it."

"You were trying to intimidate him," she said. It wasn't a question. Rolling his eyes, he started explaining himself.

"Well, he did kind of make a scene when he quit. He said 'fuck you' to me, very loudly, in front of a lot of customers and then went to work for the competition, so yeah, I guess I was a little bitter."

"You mean he went to work for your mom."

He tensed visibly when she said that. "Yes…and who happens to be the competition."

"I know I probably shouldn't ask, but…whatever, things are already really weird. What is the deal between you and her, anyway?" When he didn't reply immediately, she quickly added, "You don't have to answer if you don't want to."

His immediate reaction whenever anyone asked him about this sort of thing was to shut it down, as quickly and harshly as possible. But this was Rey. He'd prefer to talk about something else, but when would he ever get the chance to talk to _her_ again?

"Basically a lot of fighting and disagreements over what I should do with my life. She wanted me to do one thing, Dad wanted me to do another. It just got to be too pressure, too much to handle, so I just cut them off."

A moment of silence passed between them before Rey spoke up. "I can't imagine that. I'd kill to have any parents at all."

His eyes widened a little as a wave of guilt fell over him. _Shit, I shouldn't have said anything._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there will be mild drug use in this chapter and the next, so if that’s like not your thing, avoid the parts with Poe. Also, I’m going to just say BB8 is a girl here because I see people saying “he/him” a little too often and I kinda wanted to balance it. Anyway, thanks for the feedback, it really makes me smile.

Poe sat alone in his apartment, trying to read through some notes for a test as some slow, acoustic song played softly in the background. At the same time, he was rolling a joint. Typically, he didn’t mix getting high with studying, but he felt like it was the only way to quiet his mind tonight.

As he reached over for a lighter, he found it wasn’t where he left it. Glancing around frantically, it wasn’t long before he found his Corgi puppy, BB8, playing with it on the floor.

“No, that’s not for you! Drop it!” he urged the dog, who kept the lighter firmly clutched between her teeth. It only took a few moments of wrestling before Poe finally retrieved the object. Wiping it off on his shirt, he sighed before flicking it on to light the end of the joint. When he exhaled, he purposefully breathed out of the open window, trying to keep the smoke away from BB8 as much as possible.

As the high gradually started to creep in, wrapping around his mind like a warm blanket, it did quite the opposite of what he was hoping it would: he couldn’t stop thinking about Finn.

“Why does this always happen to me? Why does every guy I like have to be so painfully heterosexual?” he muttered bitterly. Looking down at BB8 dully, he sighed, wondering what she might say if she could speak.

_You don’t know that. He might like you,_ he imagined her cheerily suggesting. _  
_ “Nah, he’s obsessed with Rey.”

_He knows her. He hasn’t gotten the chance to know you yet._

Shaking his head, he returned back to his notes, trying to focus on something else for a while. But calculus was just about the last thing his brain wanted to process at the moment.

_You can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep feeling sorry for yourself that you’re alone, and not really putting yourself out there. Talk to him. At least you’ll know you tried._

“I guess you’re right,” Poe thought aloud with a sleepy grin, patting BB8 on the head affectionately. “Yeah, I should call him…”

Reaching for his phone, it took him a couple of tries before he finally pressed the right name in his contacts list. It rang a few times before he finally heard Finn’s voice, and a smile spread across his face from ear to ear.

“Hello?”

“Finn, my man!” Poe greeted him excitedly before trying to casually explain himself, but it came out as a sort of ramble. “Hey, listen, you should uh…come over. You know, I just have nothing to do and I was talking to BB8 and thinking, ‘Why not ask Finn to hang out’? I mean, we can watch some movies, play some video games, whatever, you know. So uh….yeah, do you wanna?”

There was a long pause. “…BB8? What? Are you drunk?”

“Ah….no.” It wasn’t a lie. “But I _may_ be under the influence. Don’t worry, though, I’m prepared to share.”

Another long silence passed before Finn sighed. “Alright, sure. What’s your address?”

//

 “Do you come here regularly or is this a special case for you too?” Kylo asked Rey casually, avoiding another swing of her fist as they had now advanced a little further in their sparring. It was still not so much of a fight, as just seeing if Rey could manage to hit him even as he dodged and blocked her attacks. It was not so bad acting as her human punching bag, at least while her reflexes seemed to be a little rusty.

“Semi-regularly. I don’t always have time for it,” she said, missing him yet again. “But I prefer feeling like I’d at least have a chance if I was ever in a real fight.”

“Why do you think you’d ever need to fight?”

She gave him a dull look as if the answer was painfully obvious. After a moment of thinking, he got it. “Ah. Right. Self-defense, from creepy stalkers like me.”

“Not exactly like you,” she said, and for a moment he was hopeful, before she added, “I think you’d be pretty easy to take down.”

“You haven’t seen any of what I can do, I’ve just been _letting_ you beat me up.”

“Really? Then come on, tough guy, fight back,” she taunted him. “Go on, try and hit me.”

“Are you crazy? No,” he protested, walking over to one of the punching bags instead. He gave her a brief look as if to say “watch this” before pulling back his fist and slamming it into the bag with all the force he could muster. As he had hoped, the heavy object swung back sharply, hitting the wall with a ‘thud’. But at the same time, his fist exploded with pain, throbbing and stinging in equal measures. Stumbling back, he clutched his hand, hissing between clenched teeth as he saw his knuckles were bleeding slightly.

“Shit!”

“Ouch. Maybe you should have worn a glove,” Rey said dryly, watching him in amusement.

“No gloves…in real life…”

Now in a sufficient amount of pain, Kylo decided it was about time to call it a night. Rey seemed to agree as she was quite exhausted herself. As they walked outside into the parking lot, his mind raced as he tried to think of something to say before they had to part ways.

_Isn’t this the part where I’m supposed to ask her for her number? Ugh, no, I can’t. I’m her teacher—sort of. I keep forgetting, I’m still not supposed to “fraternize” with undergrads. Not to mention, she hates me,_ he told himself, trying to shake off any thoughts of making this out to be anything more than it was. _Then again, we were already kind of “fraternizing” back there. And she didn’t have to let me stay, or talk to me, or anything…_

Before he had fully made a decision on what to do, she interrupted his thoughts.

“Well, that was fun.”

For a moment, he almost smiled. “Yeah, for you maybe.”

“Hey, I didn’t make you break your hand, you did that all on your own,” she replied teasingly. As they walked, he noticed she wasn’t going off to find her own car, but just continued following him. Only when he stopped to unlock his car did she finally start off in another direction.

“See you in class, I guess…”

“Wait--are you just going to walk home?” he called after her as soon as he realized she was heading towards the sidewalk. Stopping, Rey turned around, her breath visible in the cold air.

“Yeah, I mean, I live on campus. At the Hill.”

“I can drive you, if you want,” he offered. She looked a little hesitant. “Come on, it’s freezing out here.”

Wrapping her arms around herself, Rey slowly walked back to his car, her feet crunching through the thin layer of snow on the pavement. Settling in to the passenger seat, she glanced around, seeming to take note of every little object inside. The first thing that caught her attention were a few CD cases scattered across the floorboard.

“Who still listens to CDs?” she snickered as he got in on the other side and closed the door.

“Excuse me, but I couldn’t afford to get a Bluetooth system set up in this type of car.”

“What is this…Pearl Jam?” she continued, looking over the album covers. “I feel like I’m in a time machine.”

“Alright, I get it, you think I’m super old.”

She shot him a little smirk, glancing over his features as if trying to determine something about him. “Yeah, sure, let me guess. You’re….twenty-five?”

“Thanks, but I’m not that young.”

“Twenty-seven?”

“Getting warmer,” he mused, and not wanting to make her keep guessing, just told her the answer. “I’m twenty-nine.”

“Wow. That explains the music,” she grinned. “I’m nineteen. But my birthday is coming up in November.”

_God, she’s young._

Clearing his throat, he tried to redirect his attention to the road instead. “Which building is it?”

“Hollifield.”

It didn’t take him long to find it. As a freshman, he had stayed in one of the Hill dorms himself. He did find it strange though, that Rey still stayed in a dorm—assuming by her age she was at least a sophomore. Most people moved out into apartments after their first year. But then again, with what she had said about having no parents….

As he pulled up in front of her building, Kylo felt a sinking feeling in his chest, knowing it was now time to part ways. He wracked his brain for any excuse he could use so that he’d get to see her again—more than just passing glances during class.

“You know, Rey, we kind of need more workers at First Order, and I know for a fact it pays a lot better than—“

“I’m pretty happy at my job now, actually,” she interrupted him, quickly stepping out of the car. “But thanks. I’ll see you around.”

With that, she was gone, rushing up the stairs to swipe her ID beside the door of her building. Already beating himself up over that stupid suggestion he’d made, Kylo waited there only a moment, making sure she made it inside before speeding off into the night.

 

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

The next Monday morning at work, Rey felt a lot livelier than usual, as she had finally finished her revised history paper. She had spent a lot of effort on it this time over, and was pretty confident she would get at least a B when she turned it in later that day.

As she worked, however, she noticed that Finn and Poe weren't speaking to each other. In fact, Poe insisted on meticulously cleaning the tables and wiping the windows, even though Rey knew for a fact he hated cleaning. He kept as far away from the counter as possible.

"So, how was your weekend, guys?" Rey spoke up, glancing between the two. Both just muttered something like 'fine' or 'okay'. She pressed on with a little more small talk, bringing up school, the weather, anything that might bait them into actually saying more than two words at a time. It didn't work. After spending a few more minutes, wallowing in the agony of an awkward silence, Rey turned to Finn sharply.

"Okay, what's going on? Did you have a fight or something?" she whispered, low enough so that Poe couldn't hear. Finn quickly denied her suggestion.

"No, no, nothing happened…"

"Yeah, right," she shook her head. "You're a bad liar. Come on, I'm your friend, we can tell each other anything."

He glanced out of the corner of his eye at her, sighing with frustration. "I don't think I can talk about this."

"Whatever it is, it can't be that bad."

After what felt like another full minute, Finn looked over to see if Poe was listening. He wasn't. Turning back to Rey, he kept his eyes firmly locked on the floor as he spoke in a barely coherent mumble.

"What?" Rey couldn't understand what he had said. Screwing his eyes shut and taking a deep breath, Finn said it again, only a little louder.  
"Poe kissed me."

Rey covered her mouth with her hand, stunned and unsure if she had heard him right. She knew Poe was gay, it wasn't really a huge secret, but she didn't know he had a thing for _Finn_.

"What, seriously?"

"Yeah," Finn muttered, starting to explain. "He was stoned and called me, asking me to hang out, and I didn't have anything better to do, so I went. We were talking and watching TV and…you know, smoking. A good bit. Everything was normal and fun and then out of nowhere, he just…I mean, it wasn't forceful or anything, I just didn't see it coming."

"So I take it you didn't kiss him back."

"No," Finn replied automatically, but then bit his lip, quietly correcting himself. "Well, maybe. I can't really remember. Again, we were pretty blazed. But I mean, I pushed him off after a couple of seconds. Obviously, things were really awkward after that, so I went home."

Biting her lip, Rey's eyes drifted back over to Poe, who still apparently hadn't heard anything. She sighed wistfully. "Poor guy."

Finn shifted uncomfortably, almost looking guilty for a moment. "Yeah…I mean, he's great, I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I just….I like someone else."

"Is that so? Do tell," Rey grinned, glad for the change of subject. "Who is it?"

"It's a secret."

Pouting, she crossed her arms. "Aw, come on. At least give me a hint. Guy or girl?"

He raised a brow as if the answer was obvious. "Uh, girl."

"Is she…in one of your classes?"

"No."

"Hm. Is she…." But before Rey could continue playing her guessing game, a customer came in, interrupting their conversation. Finn breathed a sigh of relief, and avoided the subject of his love life for the rest of the day.

/

A week passed before Rey got her paper back. She was pleased to see that she not only got an A, but a 97. She couldn't remember if she'd ever gotten a grade that high on a written assignment before. But she was mildly horrified to see that her take on the efficiency of France's Third Republic made it into one of the lecture slides the following week. Her name was not included, thankfully, but when Ren went over the information, he credited it to "the most capable student in this class". Rey cringed at that, sinking down in her chair. Although he did not point her out, Kylo still managed to spot her in the sea of students, giving her a brief smile of approval. She wanted nothing more than to disappear.

/

A few weeks later, Kylo was pouring a glass of boxed wine in the kitchen when he overheard Hux on the phone in the living room, rambling on about one of his frat parties coming up in a few days. At first, Kylo just tuned it out, gulping down his drink, but after catching a few bits and pieces about just how large this party was going to be, a strange idea started forming in his head.

When Hux got off the phone and started heading back to his room, he finally spoke up.

"So what's Tau Phi Alpha celebrating this time? Did someone's CEO dad win some big golf tournament?"

"It's actually just a Halloween party….and what kind of cheap rubbish is that?" Hux scoffed as Ren had to tilt the box and shake the last of the wine out into his glass. Rolling his eyes, Kylo took the bag out and took a sip straight from the plastic spout, just to piss off Hux even further.

"Not all of us can afford Pinot Grigio from 1945 or whatever it is you drink…" he said dryly. "Anyway, what kind of people will be at this gathering? Grad students, undergrads….?"

Hux narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Both probably, it's going to be quite an event. But what business is it of yours?"

"Just wondering if it's the type of thing I'd want to go to," Kylo shrugged. A thin smile spread over the redhead's face as he smugly replied, "Well, you aren't invited."

I should have expected that. I'm probably the only person not allowed to show up, thought Kylo with annoyance. But this was the only thing he could think of in order to reach his goal. He _had_ to get into this party.

"Is there something I can do to get on the list?"

"No, probably not," Hux shook his head firmly, but then seemed to think of something. "Well…hm…perhaps."

The evil look on his roommates face was not very reassuring. Kylo's jaw dropped when Hux finally came up with a solution.

"Do you still have that ridiculous costume from your days as a theatre student?"

/

_Fucking hazing me, like I'm some goddamn freshman trying to rush for his stupid fraternity….God. I can't believe I did that. This better be worth it, or I swear…_

Kylo's furious thoughts were interrupted as the students in Skywalker's lecture hall all stood, filing towards the door as class had ended. Jumping up from his desk, he made a straight shot towards the back of the room, hoping to catch Rey before she left. When she approached one of the doors, he moved slightly in front of it to stop her.

"Hey, are you doing anything this weekend?"

Her brows furrowed as she took a step back from him, clearly suspicious. Not wanting to freak her out, he quickly started to explain, his eyes darting in every direction as he spoke.

"It's just there's this party my roommate is having, it's apparently a big deal. There'll be a lot of people—undergrads mostly, I think. Anyway, I can have a plus one, so…"

"So you thought you'd invite me of all people?" she asked, tilting her head in confusion.

"I mean, there's not really anyone else I could think of…" he muttered with some embarrassment, then sighed. "Alright, I'm kind of being forced to go to this thing and I didn't want to show up alone." He added this last little lie in a last-ditch attempt to make his offer sound less personal. She seemed to buy it.

"I see…uh, well, I don't know. I don't usually go to parties—"

"Yeah, neither do I."

"—but I don't know, I'll think about it. I might have a lot of stuff to do this weekend," she finished vaguely as she started to go around him. As she took a step out into the hallway, he remembered she should probably know where and when to show up.

"If you do decide to go, it's going to be at the Tau Phi Alpha house, on Saturday night. Probably starting around nine or ten-ish," he called after her, but she only nodded and kept walking. He felt like banging his head against the wall.

_This isn't very promising._

/

After a few more days of uneventful agony, Saturday night finally came around. Never one to be late, and more importantly, not wanting to miss Rey if she did actually show up, Kylo was one of the first people to arrive at the fraternity house. However, he didn't want to go in and socialize with Hux and his obnoxious friends just yet. So he stayed outside for a while, leaning against his car and drumming his fingers on the hood, unsure what to do. After about a half hour, Phasma drove up, parking her silver Audi across the street before walking over in his direction.

"Well, don't you look nice," she remarked with surprise. He glanced over himself, now wondering if the scarlet tie was a bit too formal for the occasion.  
"Thanks…it's not too much, is it?"

"Nah, a lot of people are probably going to show up in costumes or something, so I think you're good," she smirked. "Trying to impress someone?"

He just shrugged. "Maybe. I don't know. I'm not sure why I'm even here."

"Well come inside, you'll look a little less pathetic than standing out here all night," she said, practically dragging him inside when he didn't immediately follow her. "Come on, tell me about whoever it is you're waiting on. I'd rather hear that than listen to Hux talk about how his father is dominating the stock market…."

With some reluctance, he unsurely tried to explain the situation. A voice in the back of his head told him he was going to regret this, but honestly, he couldn't shut up about Rey if he tried. "It's this girl, she's a student in one of the classes I help teach."

"Ooh, scandalous," Phasma mused as they stepped inside the frat house. Naturally, Kylo headed straight for the bar.

"Yeah, so that's one obvious problem," he continued, pouring himself a shot of vodka. "I only noticed her because she's the only student who knows how to do more than just memorize notes. Like she hands in things that actually make me think instead of wanting to claw my eyes out. But she also works at La Résistance, so clearly that's another obstacle—"

The older woman gasped with realization as a smile spread over her face. "Wait, are you talking about that adorable little barista from across the street? The one with all the buns?"

Swallowing the shot, he shuddered as the vodka burned his throat.

"Yeah. Her." He honestly thought she wouldn't figure out who he was speaking of, especially so quickly. He didn't think anyone else really took note of who all worked for the competition. Apparently not.

"Not bad, she's cute," Phasma grinned. "A little young, though."

He nodded tiredly, already going to pour another shot. "I am aware, believe me. That's obstacle number three. Oh, and remember Finn?"

"Of course."

"Rey is friends with him, _of course_ , so she automatically dislikes me because he does, and he's told her every dirty little secret he can about me, made her think I'm stalking her or something…."

Phasma snorted with amusement and he shot her a glance. "Sorry, it's just kind of funny. I mean, all of these problems and you invited her here anyway?"

"Yes," he muttered, glancing around the room as if hoping she'd show up any moment and end his torture. "There were good moments too, though."

"Well, cheers to hoping the good outweighs the bad," the blonde declared, raising a shot glass and clinking it against his before they both downed their respective poisons.

As the night progressed, Phasma eventually stumbled off to talk to people she was actually friends with, leaving Kylo alone by the bar. When he thought he spotted someone in the crowd with her hair tied into three buns, he wondered for a moment if his mind was playing tricks on him. But he wasn't nearly intoxicated enough to start hallucinating. Pushing through the sea of people, and not caring if he stepped on any toes in the process, he made his way over to his target. His heart leaped when he saw it was, indeed, Rey.

"You showed up," he said, with a lot more excitement than he had intended. She smiled politely and nodded.

"Yeah, my friends were going, so…"

"Friends…?"

At that moment, his attention was caught by someone at the door who was shouting at a freshman pledge, Mitaka, who was assigned to make sure no strangers wandered in. Kylo didn't know the dark haired young man who was making all the fuss, but he did recognize Finn standing beside him. Seeing that, his expression darkened, and he marched over towards the entrance. The dark-haired guy kept on loudly arguing with the young pledge.  
"Seriously, I'm on the list, the name is Mace Windu and—"

"Don't let them in," Kylo hissed in Mitaka's ear, right before Rey came up beside him and started to protest.

"Let them in, they're with me!"

"Yes, let them in!" Kylo instantly changed his tune as Mitaka looked up at him with bewilderment. "Yes, you heard the lady, go on."

"Uh…you can come in," said the pledge shakily, letting the two guys enter. All four avoided eye contact before Rey attempted to break the ice.

"You know Finn, obviously…and this is Poe. He said he knew some people here, but clearly didn't…." Rey said teasingly in Poe's direction.

"I know people everywhere, I just was unlucky this time," he defended himself.

Kylo coughed uncomfortably, turning to Rey. "I wasn't expecting you to bring people…"

"Well, playing nice with my friends is the price of _my_ friendship."

"I didn't say anything about—", he started, but quickly stopped talking, knowing he would say something wrong. Suddenly starting to feel claustrophobic, he backed away from the others. "Uh…I'm going to….get another drink."

Only when he had retreated to the bar did he realize he probably should have offered her something as well.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which alcohol brings out things that would normally be OOC af. Enjoy.

_I'm starting to regret this._

This thought had entered Poe's mind more than a few times as the night progressed. He had heard about this party from one of his fraternity brothers, and thought it would be a good distraction. Apparently not. Yes, he had decided to invite Finn, even after what had happened the previous weekend, but the endless hours of silence at work had started to take an agonizing toll on him. He just wanted to forget about everything and get things back to something resembling normalcy. So, Friday, he impulsively asked if Finn and Rey wanted to come to this party, in the hopes that it would help rebuild their friendship. Rey was meant to act as a buffer, keeping a good distance between himself and Finn so that things wouldn't get weird again. With that, and some drinking to break the tension, it was a perfect plan.

He hadn't counted on her continually getting dragged off by an intoxicated and overdressed Kylo Ren.

Poe barely even knew the guy, but he was starting to see why everyone hated him. Every hour or so, he'd appear out of nowhere, pulling Rey slightly away from the rest of the group to make yet another poor attempt at small talk with her—thus, leaving Poe alone with Finn.

Several times, Poe was tempted to slip away into the crowd to go dance and mingle, but he couldn't just leave Finn all alone. It was obvious the poor sophomore didn't know anyone there and was about as uncomfortable as Poe was.

"How does Rey know him again?" he asked casually, sipping on his second beer and eyeing Finn's ex-boss. Finn shook his head and sighed.

"I have no idea, she says he invited her here before we did."

"When? Why?"

Finn threw up his arms in exasperation. "Fuck if I know. It's starting to seriously freak me out, having him just showing up around her every time I turn around…"

"Well, she doesn't look too weirded out by it." Poe shrugged. "Maybe she just hasn't told you everything."

After hearing himself say this, he immediately regretted it. _Shit, I sound like I'm calling her a liar or something, trying to make myself look more appealing…_

Wanting to correct himself on any insinuation that Rey was hiding some sort of romantic relationship from Finn, Poe then blurted out the first thought that came to mind.

"I mean, who knows, maybe they're related."

This did not help his case, as Finn's expression contorted with horror at the mere idea of it.

"That's impossible, for several reasons, but dude…don't even joke about that."

/

"Maybe you should slow down," Rey suggested after Kylo nearly collapsed into her when he randomly showed up to talk to her for about the fourth time that evening. With every hour that passed, he was getting more and more intoxicated, to the point that Rey was almost feeling secondhand embarrassment. Stumbling back and leaning onto the wall for support, Kylo looked at her as if she were the crazy one.

"What? Psshh, I'm not even…I'm not even drunk… _you're_ drunk."

After a while of having a mostly incoherent conversation due to his extreme intoxication and the blaring music, it was Rey who decided to leave suddenly.

"I'll be right back."

With the frat house being so enormous, the search for a restroom was harder than she had thought, but not impossible. She only had to try three locked doors and accidentally burst in on one couple making out before she finally found the bathroom—which she had to wait in line for.

Afterwards, glancing in the mirror at herself, she sighed, rubbing her eyes tiredly. She only drank a couple of beers, but her reflection was starting to seem a little closer than usual, like she was looking at everything from inside a fishbowl.

Finally making her way back through the hallway and down the stairs with slow, stumbling steps, she looked over towards the dining room only to see that someone was standing on top of the table. From a distance, all she could tell was that it was some blonde guy in some weird orange overalls and glasses.

_The hell kind of costume is that?_ she thought, giggling to herself and pushing through a crowd of costumed people to get a better look. When she did, and realized she knew _exactly_ who this was, she almost died laughing.

"Guys, I said stop the music! Listen….I have something very important to say…listen to me!" the bespectacled blonde whined incessantly, holding onto the chandelier above him to keep his balance.

"Man, shut the fuck up!" someone from the crowd shouted.

"No, _you_ shut the fuck up!" he screamed back, then muttered as if to himself, "Jerkface…Anyways, do you people know someone called Kylo Ren? Because you should. I—I mean, he is totally cool and he's like… _shredded._ Seriously. My buddy saw him in the shower, and…."

_Oh sweet Christ, he's actually doing this,_ Rey thought as she watched him, gaping with utter shock. _This is real. I'm never going to let him live this down._

"No, my friend is not a liar, _Ted,_ Kylo Ren really does have an eight-pack!"

Now that her sides were almost splitting from laughter, she decided this was the moment she should intervene.

"Okay, Kylo, it's time to get down now…" she said between giggles, climbing up on the table, taking his arm, and trying to coax him back to the floor.

"What? My name is Matt…" he started to protest in a slurred mumble. "I'm not Kylo Ren, why would you think that? I mean, it's flattering, because obviously he's _awesome_ , but I am but a humble radar technician."

Finally getting him to step down, she steadied him against a nearby wall. "Dude, I know it's you. Now you going to stop this nonsense or do I need to take you to the hospital to get your stomach pumped?"

He didn't seem to hear any of that. Slightly bloodshot eyes narrowing from behind his glasses, he blurted out, "Kylo Ren told me to tell you something."

She rolled her eyes and sighed. "And what's that?"

Leaning forward uncomfortably close, "Matt" whispered in her ear. "He told me to tell you that he thinks you're super awesome."

She snorted, unable to take him seriously. "Oh really? More super awesome than himself?"

"Yes," he gasped, eyes widening as if he suddenly had an epiphany. "Oh my God, I should tell everyone that. Hey, everyone! Rey is—"

"Shhh!" she quickly tried to silence him, but it wasn't fast enough. Within a few seconds, a redhead she had never seen before approached, followed by an extremely tall blonde woman.

"Oh, dear lord, what have we here…" The redhead glanced over Kylo, barely containing his laughter. The woman beside him looked more bewildered than anything.

"What on earth are you dressed as?"

"Oh, you should have seen it earlier," the redhead eagerly started to explain with a malicious gleam in his eyes. "He wanted an invitation to my party so _desperately_ that he agreed to bring out this old theatre costume and humiliate himself in front of my friends and I. It was quite amusing. What were you supposed to be in that little skit again? A cable guy?"

"A radar technician," Kylo corrected him in a low growl.

"Oh, yes, fascinating. I didn't think you'd be so eager to get back into the part. Then again, you are quite prone to embarrassing yourself…..anyway, who are you?" the other man finally asked Rey, sweeping his gaze over her judgmentally.

"She's _Rey_ ," the blonde woman grinned, wiggling her eyebrows as if she was in on some big secret. The younger girl tensed nervously.

"Uh, how do you know my name?"

"Kylo wouldn't shut up about you. Anyway, we're his roommates-slash-coworkers. I'm Phasma," she introduced herself, shaking Rey's hand and giving her a subtle wink. "Oh, and ignore Hux, he's just bitter because I beat him at beer pong yet _again_."

Rey nodded slowly, looking around for the nearest exit. "I see…well, nice to meet you both, but I think I should get 'Matt' here as far away from alcohol as possible before he passes out…"

As she started to drag Kylo away, Rey cringed as she heard Phasma cheering behind them, "Yeah, get some, Matt!"

Struggling to move with Kylo leaning on her so heavily, it took a while before Rey made it through a back door onto a large deck, escaping the noise and chaos of the party at last. Kylo instantly sought out one of the patio chairs to collapse in as Rey took a moment to soak in her surroundings. The fraternity house was laid out right next to a thick evergreen forest. Above them, a clear night sky. Were it not for all the street lights, she might have been able to see more stars, but what little she could see was still beautiful. Shivering slightly, she pulled down the sleeves of her sweater to cover her hands as she sat down next to him.

"So, theatre costume, huh?" she asked, watching him as he started to take it off, piece by piece.

"Yeah, I wanted to be an actor."

She chuckled. "Well, you are pretty dramatic."

Tossing the wig and glasses to the side, he brushed his fingers through his dark hair, shaking it out. After seeing him looking so absurd even for a few minutes, Rey had a new appreciation for his natural state.

"You said you were _forced_ to come here..."

He shrugged and let out a sigh. "It sounded a bit better than what really happened…"

"Why did you want to get into this party so bad?"

"So I could invite you…" he muttered shamefully, hiding his face in his hands. Rey's brows furrowed, but she stayed silent, unsure of what to say. A few moments passed before he straightened back up with a tired groan. "I've said too much…why can't I stop talking…?"

"You're wasted and have no filter, that's why," she explained simply. "Let's wait here a while, and whenever I'm certain _I'm_ sober, I'll drive you back."

"I don't want to go."

"Why?" she turned to him, unsure why on earth he would want to stay, after he had spent most of the night embarrassing himself. But the way he was staring back at her more than answered her question. Swallowing nervously, she quickly looked away, not sure she really wanted to know after all.

"Rey, I—"

"Seriously, don't say anything, you're going to regret it if you do," she cut him off sharply. It was barely noticeable, but there was a tremor to her voice as she said this. For a split second, a hurt expression crossed his face like a kicked puppy, but as the wheels in his head slowly began to turn, he covered it up with a small laugh.

"Or what, will you beat me up again?"

"No, I just mean, sober you will _not_ be happy afterwards. I'm just looking out for your best interest," she said, nudging his arm.

"Well, isn't that so noble of you…." He sighed, falling back in his chair lazily. "Not taking advantage of me and letting me spill all of my secrets when for once, I actually want to. I can't say I'd do the same if the situation were reversed…"

"So you're nosy."

Childishly amused at her choice of words, he gestured towards his prominent nose. "Obviously…"

"Oh, I didn't mean…"

"I know, I was teasing," he said. "I just have to point it out before other people do."

She glanced over him with disbelief. Did people actually make fun of his appearance? She wasn't about to go declare him the most handsome guy in the world, but still, he was far from ugly.

"Are you really so self-conscious? It's not like it's a deformity or something."

He shrugged. "Yeah, but still. We can't all be perfectly proportional like you."

Sensing the shift in his tone once more, she tensed slightly. "I wouldn't say that."

"Rey, seriously, look at yourself," he pressed on, his filter clearly gone once more as his gaze roamed over her, taking her in. The look in his eyes wasn't predatory so much as adoring. Worshipful, even. Despite there being no malice behind it, it was still intensely frightening to her.

"Don't pretend you aren't beautiful."

Now it was Rey's turn to cover her face with her hands, almost curling up into a ball as if this would somehow help her disappear. "I told you, you're going to regret saying that sort of thing, so please stop."

He sighed with frustration. "Why are you so afraid of me telling you the truth?"

"I'm not, I'm just—"

"Yes, you are," he insisted, then went silent for a few moments, calming himself. "I'm sorry. I realize now. It's not that you don't want to hear the truth, it's that you don't want to hear it from _me_."

"That's not it," she said impulsively. When his eyes widened, she hastily corrected herself. "I mean, yes, sort of. There's a lot of reasons you shouldn't do this, you _know_ there are, and it has nothing to do with my opinion of you. But this kind of attention coming from _anyone_ makes me uncomfortable."

"Even Finn?"

"Especially him. Wait, how do you…?"

"I don't have to read minds to tell that he likes you. Just seeing you in the same vicinity at this party is enough to know. He's very transparent," he explained, with some underlying bitterness. "So…Finn makes you more uncomfortable than _me_?"

Keeping her eyes lowered, she rubbed her hands together absentmindedly. "He makes me sadder, I should say. He and I…we've been friends for so long, and I don't want that to end, all because he wants more than that and I just don't see him that way."

Rey didn't want to see it, but it was very hard not to miss the obvious relief in Kylo's voice after he heard this. "Interesting….Have you ever seen _anyone_ that way?"

"Here and there…nothing really serious," she answered vaguely. Wanting desperately to shift the spotlight off of her, she turned it back on him. "What about you?"

"I was never much interested in all of that either. Until…"

Thankfully, he stopped there, saying nothing further than that. Standing up suddenly, Rey started to walk back and forth on an invisible line, wanting to be certain that she could drive. Her mind had been clear for a while now, and she was more than ready to leave.

"Yep, I'm pretty sure I'm stone-cold sober now! Let's go."


	8. Chapter 8

The first sensation Kylo felt the following morning was pain. It was spread out all over his body, in nausea and aches, the worst of it being an excruciating throbbing in his head. He was no stranger to hangovers, but this one was like a new, special brand of punishment for his indulgence. It was not long before the memories returned to him. Remembering everything that happened at the party, he winced from the utter mortification and turned over, trying not to think about it.

_I'm never, ever drinking again._

Then he remembered what all happened with Rey. Or at least, most of it. After she had declared herself sober and walked him over to her car, he couldn't remember many details. All he knew was that she dropped him off at his apartment, where he made yet another stupid offer, asking her if she wanted to come in. She did not.

 _And now she knows everything. God, she can probably get me fired at this point for fucking sexual harassment or something. Why couldn't I keep my damn mouth shut? Why did I even think it was a good idea to tell her that I—_ Clenching his fists, he sharply cut himself off there. _Don't think about it, don't think about it, it's not worth it, I can't do anything about it now…._

Rolling out of bed with a pained groan, he padded into the kitchen, desperately needing a glass of water. He was so dehydrated he swore he could feel his brain cells scratching together.

_At least it's Sunday, so no work. For once, I can just sit around and do nothing._

Or so he thought.

Not an hour later, as he was sitting watching some dull nature documentary, his phone started vibrating loudly against the coffee table. He never left the ringer on, so it was a rare time when he actually heard it go off.

Seeing Hux's name light up on his screen, he cringed, having half a mind to not answer. But if Hux was calling him, it had to be something important.

"Hello?"

As he expected, this was not to be a social call, as the sneering voice on the other line immediately started making demands.

" _Ren. You have to do something about the state of our business. We're in the red. Snoke came in and threatened to fire all of us if we didn't start bringing in a profit."_

Strangely, the threat of being unemployed was not what caught Kylo's attention.

"You mean, he was actually, physically there?"

" _Yes!"_

"Weird. The last time I saw him in person was when he promoted me."

" _Ah yes, yes, you_ are _the manager, which means this is entirely on you."_

Taken aback, Kylo scoffed. "What the hell am I supposed to do about it? I can't help it if people don't ever come in."

" _Use your bloody imagination and_ make it happen _. If you don't care about getting fired yourself, just know that if Phasma and I lose our jobs because of this, you will regret it."_

Groaning in frustration, Kylo almost flung the phone across the room, but thought better of it at the last second. He couldn't afford another one if he was going to lose half his income.

 _Coward…threatens me and then just hangs up before I can say anything….what would he even do? Kick me out of the apartment?,_ he thought, reluctantly trudging back into his room to get dressed, knowing he wouldn't have time to figure out this little problem on an actual work day. _I guess if we all get fired we'd have to move out anyway. He could have at least given me some sort of deadline, so at least I'd know how soon that's going to be._

/

Rey sat outside one of the offices in the engineering building, yawning and checking the time on her phone for about the fifth time. Her appointment for academic advising was at 2, but it was 2:45 and her advisor hadn't called her in yet. This didn't surprise her, however, as the new advisor for the engineering department was none other than Professor Solo, the favorite of all students in her major. He had a habit of arriving late to classes, which might have contributed to his popularity. In this case, however, it was a bit annoying.

Connecting the dots together in her mind, she gulped, knowing this meeting might be a bit awkward now, knowing what she knew. But after working for his wife for so long, surely the professor could anticipate Rey figuring it all out eventually.

Finally, she turned to see him walking down the hallway at a leisurely pace, coffee cup in hand. The green logo on it was unmistakable.

"So that's why you're late, you were at La Résistance," Rey mused, leaning back in her chair. A wry smile spread across the older man's rugged features.

"I was wondering why I didn't see you there," he said, unlocking the door to his office. "This just regular advising or do you have any particular question?"

"Just need your approval to sign up for spring semester classes. It should have said so when I made the appointment…."

"Yeah, it probably did. Sorry, I'm still getting used to this advising thing," he sighed. Sitting at his desk, he logged on to the university computer, clearly having a few technical difficulties as he tried to find Rey in the system. "Everything's so complicated…"

"You just click right there," Rey tried to assist him.

"Here?"

"No, there."

"Here?"

"No. No. Where I'm pointing to…"

"I'm just messing with you, kid, I'm not that old yet," he chuckled, clearly thinking himself very amusing. Clicking through her files at last, a grey brow raised as Professor Solo seemed to notice something interesting.

"So I see you're currently taking history with Luke…"

Rey tilted her head. "Do you know him?"

"Yeah, he's my brother-in-law…You like his class?"

She shrugged. "He's alright."

Nodding, the professor glanced away, chewing his lip. "Does he still have uh…a GTA? Tall, dark hair?"

Rey bit her lip, but decided to spare him the suspense. "Yes, Professor, I know your son."

"Oh…" Solo seemed taken aback. "Small world."

"To be fair, your family is kind of everywhere," Rey teased, hoping to ease the tension. He laughed a little at that.

"Well, Leia's is, that's for sure."

For a few moments, he continued going through her files. There was a noticeable lack of focus as he rubbed his eyes. Turning back to her and folding his hands in his lap, he cleared his throat. "This is probably a stupid question, you probably barely know him, but….how is he doing?"

"Kylo?" she asked, surprised. Did he really not have any idea?

"Jesus, he's still calling himself that?" Solo rolled his eyes and sighed. "Sorry, again, you probably don't know…"

"No, I…I didn't. Um. Well, don't worry, he's doing fine. I've actually spent a good amount of time with him, strangely…" Rey decided to stop there. She couldn't help but feel sympathy for a father who actually cared about his child (unlike her parents ever had), but there were certain things he probably shouldn't know. A lot of things. Hoping Solo wouldn't ask any more questions, she decided to come up with one of her own.  
"What's his real name?"

The older man hesitated a long moment before responding with a faint smile. "Ben."

 _It's so ordinary,_ Rey thought, unable to imagine the bizarre young man she knew ever going by such a name. _That's probably why he changed it. From what I've seen, he can't stand being normal for two seconds._

/

The newest employee of La Résistance, a blonde freshman named Connix, couldn't have been happier her first day of work. Her parents had been pressuring her incessantly to get a job for about a year, and she had been dreading it, but La Résistance welcomed her with open arms. Thanks to the helpful nature of her coworkers, it all wasn't nearly as nerve-wracking as she had first assumed. That is, until she had to close up shop the same evening, and was left alone to deal with a bizarre situation involving a man claiming to be an "espresso machine technician".

Staring dubiously at the man in front of her, she listened to him explain his reason for being there. Her eyes mostly glanced between his unnaturally bleached blonde hair, and his nametag, upon which "Matt" was scribbled.

"Uh…I don't think any of our machines are malfunctioning, sir."

This wasn't enough to make him go away. "Are you sure?"

Her eyes darted back and forth. "Yes?"

"Well, I have to come in regularly just to make sure everything is running properly, up to health code standards and all," he continued, then reached in his pocket for something. Connix flinched, half expecting him to withdraw some sort of weapon, but it was only a piece of paper. "Want to see my permit?"

"Uh…okay," she took it hesitantly, her gaze immediately drifting towards the line at the bottom where her boss's signature was located. It certainly looked like Mrs. Organa's handwriting. "Yeah, come on in…"

The stranger in orange did not hesitate, waltzing in past her as if entering his own house. After a brief glance around the café, he turned back around, looking at her expectantly behind thick wire frames.

"It'll take a long time so…"

When the fidgety freshman didn't move immediately, "Matt" pressed on with his explanation. "That's why I came after closing, so it wouldn't interrupt any working hours."

"Oh, okay. That makes sense. I guess…" she mumbled, shuffling her feet.

"So you can leave now."

Connix didn't need to be told twice. _Screw it, let him burn the place down or whatever if he isn't really here to check the machines, I'd rather get fired than murdered…_

/

_Alone at last._

Kylo knew exactly where to go first to fulfill his mission. Immediately turning towards the office in the back, he jiggled the handle, surprised to see that it was left unlocked.

 _You really should be more careful, Mom_.

As the door swung open with a quiet creak, his gaze wandered around the room, taking in every detail. Aside from the addition of a few more pictures and knickknacks, nothing much had changed. Even that damn graduation picture of him was sitting in the same place on her desk, just as it was the last time he saw it. He was certain his mother only chose that photo because she knew how much he hated it.

Wrinkling his nose, he turned away from the image of his younger self with disgust. _God. Someone should have told me to stop letting her cut my hair. No wonder I was always single._

Redirecting his attention towards the desk itself, rather than what was on top of it, he tried to pull at one of the drawers. It didn't budge. Apparently, his mother was a little more cautious than he first thought. But it wouldn't keep him from getting inside. His first instinct was to just try and force it open, yanking on the handle with all the violence he could muster. Still, it wouldn't open. Huffing from frustration and exertion, he glanced around, trying to find something that could help him. On top of a nearby file cabinet was a mug covered with tacky, cartoonish hearts. And inside it was not some disgusting leftover coffee, but instead was filled with pencils and paperclips.

_Paperclips!_

Plucking two out of the pile, Kylo straightened one out completely, then formed the second one into a slight hook. Crouching beside the desk, he got to work picking the lock.

_Well, Dad, at least you taught me something useful…_

After a few tries, there was a click, and the drawer was open. Rummaging through the contents of the desk, Kylo mostly just found papers and office supplies. In the back corner of the drawer, however, his fingers brushed against something angular and smooth, something no bigger than his thumb. His eyes brightened as he discovered what it was: a flash drive.

Plugging it in to the office laptop, he frowned as the screen asked for the password. Of course. How could he have forgotten that? Wracking his brain, he thought back to whenever he had to logon to some account or another for his parents. Almost every time, it had been the digits of his mother's birthday, sometimes with her initials if the site required it. But when he typed in her birthday, it said the password was incorrect. He tried again, this time with her initials, and was again denied access. He tried his father's birthday. Wrong again. After a few more attempts, he was about to just give up, then hesitantly, he typed in his own birthday.

121387

The home screen appeared instantly, showcasing a photo of both Han and Leia on some park bench, dwarfed by a brown Tibetan Mastiff sitting between them. Chewie, the beloved beast, could easily have been mistaken for a bear.

_Seriously? Using my own birthday as a passcode? For all their paranoia about the internet, baby boomers sure aren't the best at protecting their shit._

Seeking out the flash drive and its contents, he found that most of the information on it was related to dull financial records. Profits, losses, et cetera. But the last file, which was untitled, caught his attention. A huge smirk spread across his features as he opened it.

It was a list of recipes for every La Résistance menu item that had ever existed. And in every drink, was indeed a kind of secret ingredient, or at least things that he never would have thought of adding to coffee. But apparently, it worked wonders for Leia's business. And now it would work wonders for First Order of the Day.

 _So it wasn't cocaine that made it so good, after all,_ he thought with amusement, shutting the computer down and leaving the office with a fresh spring in his step. His boss would certainly be pleased with him now.

He just crossed the threshold outside when he haphazardly decided to turn back, having a last minute idea.  
 _Machines aren't broken? Well, they are now._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the long wait for this chapter, guys. College has been crazy. Anyway, thanks for all the feedback, as usual.


	9. Chapter 9

"…An 'espresso machine technician'?"

"Yeah. It was really weird. But what was I supposed to do?" Connix defended herself to Finn and Rey, crossing her arms over her orange La Résistance apron. "He showed me a permit with Leia's signature and said he came here regularly to check up on the machines or whatever."

"Uh, we don't have a maintenance guy who checks our machines, we deal with that ourselves," Rey commented, brow raised with suspicion. "What did this guy look like?"

"Uh…blonde…tall…"

Before Connix could give a more detailed description, Finn let out an exasperated groan.

"Can someone please tell me why strange, tall men keep popping up here at closing time to harass the one employee left alone?!"

"More importantly, what's going on with the espresso machine?" Poe interrupted their conversation from the counter, a puzzled look on his face. Rey walked briskly over to see what was wrong, as Finn stood awkwardly, unsure what to tell the customer. After watching Rey start tinkering on the inside of the machine, he decided to take over the register.

"Sorry, our espresso machine isn't working…can I get you something else?"

A minute later, Rey found the source of the problem. "The over pressure valve has been removed."

"What?" Connix, who had been not-so-discretely ogling one of the customers, suddenly redirected her attention back to them.

"Why would it be removed?" Poe asked. Rey shrugged, reaching her hand inside the machine to see if the valve had simply fallen out of sight.

"No, it's gone. And around it feels rough, like there's scratch marks or something."

"Like an animal got in there?"

Rey rolled her eyes. "No, Poe, like someone forced it out with a screwdriver or something."

"Oh shit."

Everyone turned to look at Connix, who was groaning in disbelief. "It was that guy..."

"Shocker," Finn snorted. "I mean, you can't really be surprised, can you?"

The blonde girl tightened her arms around herself, shaking her head. "I'm sorry, I just didn't want to get murdered for not letting him in…"

"It's fine, Connix, I'm sure we can replace the valve," Poe tried to reassure her. "It can't be that expensive."

"Nope," Rey corrected him with a dull sigh as she continued to inspect the machine. "The wiring at the bottom is all slashed up. We'd have to get another machine entirely."

It ended up being an extremely slow week at La Résistance. Everyone thought the broken espresso machine would just be a mild inconvenience to people who wanted a macchiato, not a business-ruining ordeal. But ever since then, less and less people came to La Résistance, whilst more and more could be seen across the street.

It was past nine thirty one morning when they got their first customer. Looking like he just walked off some retro movie set as always, Han Solo strolled into the café with a nonchalant wave towards everyone.

"Mr. Solo, it's been a while! Decided to pay us a pity visit in our economic despair?" Poe teased, gesturing to the otherwise entirely empty café. Han rolled his eyes.

"Nice to see you too, Dameron."

"What are you doing here?" Leia greeted her husband at first with pleasant surprise, but then caught sight of the cup in his hand. It had an unmistakable black and red logo. "…And why were you at First Order?"

"Took the day off. Thought I'd try again, with…you know."

At hearing this, Leia immediately pulled him off to the side a little, lowering her voice. "And?"

"Didn't go well, of course," Han sighed. "He caught one glimpse of me through the window and then just ran off to lock himself in his office, while his lackeys tried to pretend he was never there. Told me to leave when I wouldn't believe them. Ridiculous."

"Guess the visit wasn't worth the overpriced coffee."

Han shrugged. "Actually, this time, it was. It tastes better somehow. I don't know what they did to it."

"Really? Let me try," she said, taking the cup. Her eyes narrowed as she took a slow sip. "This tastes exactly like the lattes we serve here…"

"It does? Hm, you must have better taste than I do. I can tell when it's good but not if it's from one specific place."

From the counter, Rey continued to eavesdrop on their conversation, becoming tenser as it progressed. Someone had completely destroyed their espresso machine last week and now someone apparently got ahold of Leia's recipes. And all the while, the only one who was benefitting from all this was First Order of the Day.

_Maybe it's Connix, she might have made up that whole thing about the 'espresso machine technician' just to cover for herself. Maybe they're paying her good money over at First Order to screw over the competition,_ Rey thought, her mind scrambling for an explanation. _No, that's absurd. Sending out spies to work for us undercover? More likely than not, she was telling the truth and it was just one of their own employees pretending to be a maintenance guy._

Shifting over towards the window, she peered out across the street, trying to spot the employees from the customers inside First Order. There was that pretentious ginger and blonde woman, whom Rey had briefly met at that Halloween frat party. For a moment, she wondered if Connix was talking about Phasma, but even with her extreme height and broad shoulders, the woman couldn't be so easily mistaken for a man. And aside from her, there were no other blondes working at First Order.

Rey finally caught sight of Kylo. Now that Han was gone, he was emerging from his office like a skittish fox out of its den. Not a moment later, his eyes immediately pinpointed her through the windows as if he sensed she had been staring at him. Quickly glancing away, a strange thought entered her mind.

_Connix didn't just say it was a blonde, she said he was pretty tall. Could it be…no. No way. I'm just thinking that it somehow has to be Kylo only because Leia is obviously talking about him right now with Han. But that doesn't mean he literally disguised himself as "Matt" in order to steal our bloody recipes like some villain from a Sunday morning cartoon. That's even more absurd than Connix being some sort of undercover spy...whatever, I'm being ridiculous._

/

Meanwhile, First Order had gone from being no-man's land to being a local hot spot in just a matter of days. It didn't have the warm charm of La Résistance, but it worked like a well-oiled machine, churning out all of their new drinks to the increasing influx of customers without skipping a beat. Hux's networking and Phasma's cheaply made advertisements on campus helped a good bit with this, but ultimately the reason they kept the customers they reeled in was all thanks to Kylo. Nobody asked where he got the recipes from, nor did they seem to care. It wasn't as if his coworkers had a moral compass or anything. They were just happy to still have a job.

And so was he, to some extent.

But as he looked at the dismally empty café across the street, he found he did not feel as satisfied as he should. The fleeting twinge of shame within him was magnified threefold when his eyes met Rey's for a brief moment.

_I've done worse things, what should it matter?_

Retreating back to his office, he locked the door behind him and slumped down in his office chair. Spinning from side to side absentmindedly, he took a second to enjoy a moment of silence before turning to the laptop on his desk. He and often escaped his café duties by turning to GTA duties. It was his preferred job, for one thing, but it also left him with a longer to-do list.

After distracting himself by grading a sufficient amount of tests, he reached for the nearest flash drive to save the results, but paused. It was the same flash drive he stole from his mother's office. Rolling his eyes, he pushed down the feeling that arose from this realization, and thrust the USB in his pocket.

_I probably shouldn't just leave it out on my desk like this._

When First Order closed, Kylo headed towards his car as usual only to be surprised by the sight of a small dog, orange and white, bounding up to him on short legs. It looked up at him expectantly as if wanting something. Glancing around unsurely, he didn't see anyone else in sight, and slowly crouched to stroke between the dog's ears.

"Hello there…where is your owner?" Grasping the white collar, he barely got a look at the strange name 'BB8' on the tag before the corgi wriggled away from him. As he reached to try again and see if there was also a phone number on the tag, he heard a small clatter as something fell out of his pocket onto the concrete. The object was between the dog's teeth in an instant. Realizing it was the flash drive, Kylo started to panic.

"No, put that down!"

Raising his voice had never bothered Chewie (and most of the time was actually necessary for the beast to even listen to him) but this dog seemed a little more sensitive, immediately taking off in terror. Kylo ran after the animal without thinking, but he was far outmatched in speed—even with the advantage of ridiculously long legs.

Panting and leaning against a brick wall to catch his breath, he fumed as he thought of all the work he would now have to redo, work he knew he should have saved somewhere else as a backup. It would definitely take a few hours.

" _Fuck!"_

/

_This can't actually be what I think it is._

Rey stared at her computer screen, scrolling frantically through the file until she found her name on the list of grades. She was momentarily distracted by the fact that she got an A this time, and a brief smile graced her lips, but not for long.

Ten minutes earlier, she had been walking back to her dorm from the library when she came across BB8, who had been lying out on the green space chewing on a USB. Of course the first thing she did was text Poe and let him know she'd found his dog, but she was too curious to resist seeing what was on the flash drive. It was not just all the test scores for her class that she just happened to find, there was also some much more damning information now at her fingertips: all of La Résistance's private files, including financial records and recipes.

Rey was a smart girl, but it didn't take a genius to put two and two together.

_It actually was him. My ridiculous, paranoid theory was right. Holy shit…_

"Fucking _Matt_ …!" she muttered to herself, snapping her laptop closed and ripping out the USB as if it were a dangerous object. She stared at it for a while, her mind filing through several options on the next course of action.

_Tell Leia. Tell Finn. No, not that. Tell the police. If this is even illegal. Well, pretending to be someone you're not is illegal, I'm pretty sure….Use it for blackmail. Demand he stop using the information and pay for a new machine—and then some—or else I'll tell Leia. What if that doesn't work? What if he doesn't care? Threaten to sue for sexual harassment. If it comes to that, maybe._

She kept the USB hidden in her pocket when Poe came to pick up his lost puppy, and did not take it out again until after she drove over to Kylo's apartment. Being there only once after the Halloween party, she was surprised she actually found the right complex, let alone the right door. Of course, her first thought had been to simply make a confrontational call, but since she'd purposefully avoided getting his number, that wasn't an option.

When Kylo opened the door, he barely had time to react before Rey made her reason for being there painfully clear.

"Hey _'Matt'_ , you might want to be more careful with your stolen property next time."

His face paled as his eyes fixated on the flash drive in her hand. "Oh…fuck..."

"Yeah, I'd be panicking if I were you too. But you're really lucky because I, unlike you, have a passing sense of morality and decided to come to you first rather than someone else…" she said pointedly, still keeping the USB firmly in her grasp for now. "Who steals something and then saves information on it that can obviously only be linked back to them? Idiot."

"I know, I know, I just…"

"It's pathetic! What the fuck is wrong with you?" she interrupted him sharply, her cheeks gradually reddening. "What, were you just so jealous that we were doing better off than you, or was it some weird personal shit? Trying to get back at your mom, or are you still on about it with Finn? Or were you trying to get _my_ attention? Because you've got it, but not in the way you'd like."

At first, it looked like he was going to crumble right there, but something about her last words brought a flash of anger to his eyes as he straightened up to his full height.

"It was my boss, alright, he was going to fire me if I didn't do something to bring in a profit. Sure, it was stupid, but it worked. And don't flatter yourself alright, you didn't have anything to do with it. Surprisingly, my life doesn't revolve around you."

Rolling her eyes, she scoffed. "Ah, yes, twist my words why don't you? Just tell yourself that I _want_ your attention to make you seem like the normal one. That's great. You know, I think I'll keep this and tell Leia everything…"

She started to walk off with the flash drive when he rushed after her, grabbing her arm—not tight enough to hurt, but enough to keep her still. At least, until her boot slammed into his shin. Hard.

"Don't touch me," she warned quietly as he stumbled back, hissing with pain. A few moments of silence passed before he looked back at her with defeat.

"I'm sorry, okay, just…please, _please_ don't tell her," he begged. "I'll do anything."

"Anything?" she crossed her arms, looking over him thoughtfully. "Well first off, tell your boss to stop using those recipes now, and whatever else you're using to fuck over our business. Get us another espresso machine."

"Anything else?"

She furrowed her brow in deep thought before answering. "You apologize to your mother."

"What? No!" he shook his head quickly, crossing his arms. "No, the deal is, I do all of this and she doesn't ever know—"

"No, the deal is _I_ won't tell her, or anyone else," she corrected him. "If you don't want to follow my rules, fine. I'll make sure you get what's coming to you. But if you do what I say, I'll defend you. Make it as painless as possible."

He glared at her for a moment before muttering, "All or nothing, hm? Why do you even care?"

Biting her lip, she looked away. "I heard them talking about you. How your father keeps trying to talk to you and you won't let him. I felt sorry for them."

"For _them_?" he snorted. "You don't know shit about my family, Rey."

This almost made her snap right then and there. Stalking forward, she was inches away from slapping him as her voice raised dangerously high. "At least you _have_ one, you prick! God, you are so spoiled, you don't know what actual struggle looks like! I would _love_ to watch you try to live my life. You're going to be real sorry when they're gone, you know that? So grow the _fuck_ up and talk to them already!"

He leaned against the wall, seeming to be trying to make himself smaller as he stared at her with a look she couldn't quite place. It was a mixture between shock, fear, and something else. She waited, taking sharp breaths, but he wasn't saying anything.

Losing her patience, she demanded an answer. "So what's it going to be?"


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kylo's life goes to hell

"I'm so glad Rey managed to find BB8," Poe sighed as he cradled the runaway pup in his arms, who was now licking at his face excitedly. "I was so worried!"

"Yeah, that was pretty lucky," agreed Finn, walking beside Poe. Before Rey had called Poe, the two men had been aimlessly wandering down the street from his apartment, calling out for BB8 but not knowing what else to do in order to find her. She'd never gotten out before.

"Thanks for coming with me to look for her. That was really nice," Poe said with a sunny smile, which unexpectedly sent a flush up to Finn's face. Unnerved by the feeling, but deciding to think nothing of it, he gave a shrug.

"It's no problem. We're friends, of course I'd help you."

Silence fell over them as they made their way along the sidewalk, bathed in the orange glow of streetlights. Near the point where they had to part ways to go to their respective homes, Poe turned to Finn.

"You know, I finally got my private pilot license last week and I was just thinking, would you want to fly with me sometime? Since I'm now legally allowed to carry passengers and all."

"Wow, congratulations on getting your license—"

"Thanks!"

"—and I uh…yeah. I'd love to come," Finn nodded after a moment's hesitation, eyes flitting about nervously. This did not go unnoticed by Poe.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, yeah, it's just uh…I've never been on a plane in my life," Finn admitted. "But I do want to go. Really."

A wide grin spread across Poe's features. "Well, I'm honored you'll be sharing your first time with me."

/

The beat up Mustang loudly pulled up in front of a white, two story house, located in one of the towns most esteemed residential areas. The house seemed to have been built in the twenties or so, but was kept in peak condition. The huge columns rising from the spacious porch up to an overhanging roof suggested wealth, but a rope swing underneath a nearby oak tree gave a nostalgic, comfortable feeling to the place—at least to Rey, who was staring at all of it with wonder. Kylo, however, seemed unnerved the moment he set foot on the property, and grew even more agitated as Rey urged him on up to the porch.

"Alright, it's time. Go in there."

"No."

"Apologize."

"No."

Shoving Kylo towards the front door of the house yet again, Rey huffed in frustration. " _Yes_ , unless you want _me_ to tell her what you've been doing behind our backs!"

"Do you realize how much you're asking of me?" he snarled. "Pay you back, replace the machine, talk to my parents, tell them about the flash drive—I mean, for fuck's sake, give me some time to—"

"I think I'm being fairly lenient compared to others I could easily tell about this," she reminded him sharply, now resorting to pulling him by the collar with her rather than just pushing him in alone. She quickly found it was like trying to drag a particularly large dog into the vet's office.

"Can you please, for once in your life, act like an adult? You are the most ridiculous, childish, cowardly fuck I've _ever_ had the displeasure of—"  
The matter was quickly settled when the door opened behind Rey, revealing none other than Leia. Her jaw was dropped and her eyes were wide.

"Ben?"

He cringed at the name, backing away as Leia approached him. Rey, meanwhile, stood by with her arms crossed, trying to hide a satisfied smirk that threatened to betray her feelings.

"What are you doing here?" Leia asked, bewilderment still evident in her stare. "And with her?"

Kylo stumbled with his words. "I've come to…to…" If looks could kill, Rey would be a pile of ashes on the ground. "Apologize."

"For what?"

"Um…."

"For cutting us off?"

" _No._ Not that at all," he said firmly, despite Rey shoving him in the arm. "I'm not apologizing for that."

A cold resignation returned to Leia's expression. "Then _what_?"

"For ruining your business this past week or so," he spit it out last.

Rey tried to amend the situation by quietly suggesting, "Look, can we talk inside or something?"

With some hesitation, Leia invited them in, leading them towards the living area. Rey, still in awe of the material value surrounding her, wondered how anyone growing up in such a place would want to leave it. Especially considering how charming and kind Rey had always thought Han and Leia to be.

Sitting down on an armchair across from the other two, Leia cleared her throat. "Alright, just…start at the beginning."

Not surprisingly, the actual explanation of events came from Rey, whereas the majority of Kylo's input was an excuse for something or another. While they both expected Leia to be angry, she still did not seem to be over her initial confusion just yet.

"Wait…how do you two know each other, again?"

"Not important…"

"Class," said Rey. "He's the GTA, I mean."

This seemed to catch Leia's interest.

"So you must be in Luke's class?"

"He wasn't supposed to tell you I was working for him…" Kylo muttered under his breath. Leia rolled her eyes.

"What did you expect, he's my brother. Of course he told me," she said, then turned to Rey. "Coming here was clearly your idea, so tell me, how did you just happen to figure out my son was behind all of this? If he's really just your GTA, I mean, it just seems a little—"

"Again, not important," Kylo hissed, staring at Rey intently as if trying to keep her quiet with his will alone. It seemed to work.

"I think I've mortified him enough for today," Rey said. But when he wasn't looking, she mouthed towards the older woman: _'I'll tell you later'._ A hint of a smile indicated Leia agreed to this, and she shifted to another subject.

"Who else knows about this?"

"No one," Rey answered, glancing at Kylo. "Obviously, he would like to keep it that way."

Fidgeting in his seat, and clearly uncomfortable with even a few moments of silence, Kylo reached into his pocket to retrieve the flash drive, which he tossed towards Leia.

"Here. I'm paying you back for the espresso machine, and whatever else I can scrape together to recompense for the profits lost."

"And he'll remove all of your menu items from First Order," Rey chimed in. His jaw clenched.

"I'll do my best, but it might be out of my control at this point," he said tightly, wringing his hands before rising to his feet. "Now, if there's nothing else I can do as far as damage repair, I'll just be leaving now…"

He only took a few steps before Leia stopped him. "So soon?"

"Well, I doubt you'd want to do any catching up, considering the reason for this visit..." he muttered, hands stuffed in his jacket pockets and eyes looking everywhere except at his mother. She sighed, taking a step forward.  
"If anything, it makes me want to know even more. It's still good to see you after so long, even if—"

He cut her off sharply. "Stop. I know you don't mean it, so don't say it. You don't have to lie and pretend to be the all-forgiving mother just because someone is watching. Believe me, Rey is the _last_ person who would judge you for hating me. You two have that in common."

With that, he stormed out, and in a matter of seconds, an engine outside was revving and his car peeled away down the street.

Swallowing, Rey let out the breath she didn't realize she'd been holding. "Well then. I guess I'll be walking home, then."

"No, no, I'll drive you. It's the least I can do," Leia waved her off. "Now, what was it you were going to say earlier?"

/

"Are you serious!? You can't just throw me out now! Stop! _I still live here!"_

"You already missed one payment, next month's rent is coming up soon, and we aren't getting paid as much as we used to thanks to your bloody _honesty_ , Ren," Hux snarled, tossing more of Kylo's belongings out the door of their apartment. "Now since that Organa woman is threatening to sue First Order for copyright infringement, among other things, we'll be lucky if we still have a job to _go_ to. And even if we do, we've still got to get a new roommate that can actually pay the rent. Simple as that."

"Get your hands _off_ that laptop, I'm not going anywhere!"

Pushing Hux away from his things with a violent shove, Kylo turned to Phasma in desperation. "Phasma, come on, you have to give me a couple of more weeks, I'll find another job and pay you back."

"We've already given you a couple of weeks," she said stonily. "And you did kind of fuck up the entire business…."

Kylo practically exploded at this. "The business was _already_ fucked, you incompetent pricks! I was trying to _save_ it, unlike you, and if I didn't do what Snoke asked, I was going to be fired anyway! I just got caught—and _then_ , if I didn't do what Rey asked, you'd all be threatened with a lot worse than a lawsuit, which probably won't even happen—"

"Rey?" Phasma repeated, raising a brow. "What does that little café girl have to do with any of this?"

"Who the hell is Rey?" Hux asked annoyedly.

"She's that girl we met at the party who was babysitting his drunk ass, remember?"

"Oh yes…why don't you try and move in with her, Ren?" Hux said in a sarcastic drawl. "Seems like she's quite accustomed to putting up with your nonsense."

Fists clenched at his sides and blood boiling in his veins, Kylo was barely containing his rage. "You know what, just fucking forget it, I'm going."

Haphazardly shoving his clothes, electronics and other items into bags and suitcases, he threw them outside with his other belongings before turning back to his roommates with an eerie gleam in his eyes.

"Just one last thing."

The first item to be destroyed was a floor lamp in the living room, which Kylo picked up, swung, and smashed against the wall. Next, he swept his arm over the counter, clearing it of every one of Hux's overpriced, empty wine bottles, which fell into pieces on the tile floor. This was followed by the dishes in the kitchen sink, which were slammed against the fridge and broken one by one. As Kylo's rampage continued and broken glass littered the floor, Phasma and Hux stared in silent horror before slowly breaking out of their shock enough to try and stop him.

"Get out, get out! _Get the fuck out!"_ Hux screeched, pointing furiously towards the door. Kylo, panting from the exertion and looking at them with a crazed expression, was already on his way out.

"You'll have to pay for all of this!" Phasma called after him, but he just let out a hollow laugh.

"With what money? You don't have _anything_ on me anymore. Fuck you and goodbye."

/

It was hard to fit all six or seven bags into the vintage two-seater Mustang, even with the trunk space. But as he finished forcing everything into place, leaving barely enough space for him to drive, he wondered what all he'd have to sell just to have enough room to sleep in the vehicle. Living in his car did seem to be the only option now.

" _Why don't you try to move in with Rey"…ridiculous, she lives in a dorm, probably has a roommate who would throw a fit about me being there, or some RA who would report me. But it's just temporary, maybe no one would find out…if she'd let me,_ he thought as he started to drive. _You know what, she_ should _let me. She's the one who got me into this shit in the first place. If she didn't blackmail me, I'd still have a job and an apartment, and wouldn't have to fucking humiliate myself by apologizing to Leia._

Cruising through the parking lot behind Rey's dorm building, he found a spot to park and wait.

_It's a work day for her, and it's almost eight. She should be coming back any minute now._

It was later than he expected when she finally arrived. Half an hour later, in fact. _That's odd,_ he thought. Stepping out of the car, he caught up behind her just as she slid her student ID through the slot by the building entrance. When she sensed his presence, Rey let out a startled yelp.

"Oh my God!" she gasped, the door partially pushed open by her foot as she gawked at him. "What on earth are you doing here?"

"Well, Rey, I got fired," he started off bluntly. He had no time for niceties today.

"Fired?"

"Yes, fucking fired, because of your endless list of demands—"

He was cut off as the door alarm started to obnoxiously ring from being held open too long, and Rey yanked him inside. Her demeanor changed instantly.

"Oh no, you don't get to blame me for this. It's your own fault you got fired, for everything that you did—"

Rolling his eyes, he seethed, "Why does nobody understand this, I only did it because I was afraid of getting fired in the first place!"

"Then again, looks like I have nothing to do with it, you were screwed either way," she snapped back, narrowing her eyes. "I'd blame your shitty boss if I were you."

"Well, he's not going to help me with the fact that I'm now homeless, is he?"

Rey blinked, lip curling in disbelief as she slowly realized what he must be implying. "Is that why you're here? What, do you think you're going to move in with me? Into my dorm? Are you insane?"

He was already inching closer. "I have nowhere else to go."

"What about to your _house_ , you fucking moron?" she shrieked, causing him to stumble back until he was pressed against the door. He groaned with exasperation.

"I _can't_ just go live with my parents, you don't understand—"

Eyes hardened, she reached around him to open the door before forcing him back outside with a determined thrust of her arms. "Well, you'd better find a friend or something, because you're not staying here!"

"But I don't have any—" The door slammed in his face, and the automatic lock clicked, keeping him shut out for good. "Friends…" he finished under his breath to himself. He thought of banging on the door (or maybe breaking it down), but he knew there was no use.

_I shouldn't have even tried with her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, and sorry about the wait. As always, comments are really appreciated.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys soooo much for the comments. Seriously, every one of them just makes my day. Also, happy Mother's Day, everyone! (And happy Mother's Day to Leia, who we all know deserved better)

"You sure you're ready for this, buddy?"

"Yeah, yeah, absolutely! I am _so_ ready."

Finn almost believed his own words at the time, but now he was severely regretting them. The moment the small plane started moving down the runway, even before it had taken off, he could feel his stomach tying up in knots. 

_Oh God. Oh God, oh no, I should not have done this, I--_

He let out a terrified shriek as the plane shot up into the sky at a nearly vertical angle. Poe, meanwhile, seemed to be having the time of his life, laughing with exhilaration as he maneuvered through the air as easily as a fish through water. Glancing over towards Finn, who was shaking and sweating after they did a flip, Poe reached over to pat him on the shoulder reassuringly. 

"It's okay man, relax. It's just like a rollercoaster--wait, don't tell me you've never been on a rollercoaster before either?"

"Yes, I've been on a rollercoaster," Finn snapped, then looked away sheepishly. "I mean, it was a kiddie one, when I was about ten, but still...."

Poe snickered. "Alright, alright, I'll try to fly more like a granny then, just for you."

Finn's hands gradually stopped trembling as the plane settled into more of a slow, flat course. As he relaxed, he was finally able to take a moment and look out the window to the view down below. The sheer distance to the ground was nerve wracking, but at least the miles and miles of snow-covered evergreens were something calming to look at.

"This is nice," he finally admitted to Poe. "At least, when I don't feel like I'm going to die."

The pilot beamed. "Think I can kick it up a notch yet?"

Finn hesitated, biting his lip. "Maybe a little....No flips though! Or diving straight towards the ground like you're _trying_ to crash..."

"Oh, alright. We'll just go sideways then."  
"Wait, what?!"

* * *

 "No. Sorry. You can't stay here."

Luke always looked bored and exhausted with life in general these days, but he had never appeared so apathetic as now, when his nephew had begrudgingly come to his door to ask for help. After Kylo had wasted the time and the gas money to drive out to this shady cabin in the middle of the woods, practically begging for a place to stay, that was all Luke could say to him? Staring blankly at his uncle, Kylo couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Seriously? I know this is a small place, but surely you have a couch or something..."

"Maybe I do, maybe I don't," Luke shrugged. "Either way, you're not staying here."

"But why?!"

"Because I don't want you to," said the older man simply, crossing his arms over his beige night robe. 

Scoffing indignantly, Kylo turned away in disgust. "Great. Just fucking great. You were my last resort."

Luke let out a hollow laugh. "Oh, thanks. That really makes me want to help you."

"Whatever," Kylo muttered, already storming off when his uncle called after him. 

"Go home, Ben."

Whipping around furiously, Kylo's eyes narrowed, challenging Luke to call him by that name again. "What did you say to me?"

"Go. Home. Ben," Luke repeated with a dull sigh. "They miss you."

Kylo snorted and started to trudge off again, boots crunching in the snow and leaves as he went. "No, they don't."

"Well, if I was your last resort..." continued the older man. "It doesn't seem like you have too many options, does it?"

Clenching his jaw, Kylo stood still, his back still turned on his uncle as he tried to think. Sleeping in his car, he soon found, was impossible. He couldn't afford a hotel. His office, if he could call it that, was a shared one, and it was probably against some sort of rule to sleep there. Then Rey outright refused to help him, telling him the same tired suggestion that Luke was giving him now.

But, as Luke had said, what choice did he have left? 

* * *

It was over. Oh, sweet relief. Finn wanted to leap out of the plane and kiss the ground as soon as they landed, but he managed to contain his joy. As Poe helped him out of the aircraft, he awkwardly tried to think of something to say. 

"Hey, uh...I just wanted to say thanks. That was actually kind of fun."

"Anytime," Poe nodded, flashing a smile before giving him a casual embrace. It was brief, but comforting. Once again, Finn felt different than he thought he should. It was a feeling he couldn't quite describe, or perhaps, was afraid to. No, it couldn't be that, it was probably just leftover adrenaline from flying, or maybe--

"Oh my God," he gasped as he suddenly realized something. 

"What is it?"

Finn pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, shaking his head as if ashamed at himself. "I just realized Rey's birthday is coming up in a couple of days and I haven't gotten her anything! And I don't know what I would even get..."

"I'm sure it's fine. I mean, I don't usually get my friends anything on their birthdays except maybe a beer--" 

"No, no, if I don't get her something, I don't know if she'll have anything," Finn said worriedly, then lowered his voice. "She doesn't have a family, Poe."

Poe's expression fell. "Oh. I knew her situation was...different, but I didn't know it was that bad. Wow." Poe rubbed the back of his neck, looking off pensively. "Well, maybe we can throw her a surprise party. At work. We'll get a cake, everyone will be there...it'll make her feel special. I promise." 

Finn nodded, a smile starting to form, but then he thought of something else. "You think Leia would let us?"

"Oh yeah, she loves Rey," Poe said assuredly. "I'm surprised she hasn't adopted her yet, to be honest."

* * *

 

"Han, please. We both adore her, and it would just be until the spring semester. Just a month, really."

No matter how much Leia persisted, Han continued to shake his head, now waving his hand to emphasize his strong opposition to the idea. "Again, _no._ I really don't think that's a good idea. I mean, we both know from experience that parenting is not exactly our strong suit." 

Scoffing, Leia continued to follow him as he made his way from the foyer into the bedroom. "Maybe _you're_ a bad parent, but I'm not. And don't be so dramatic, it's not parenting! It's just temporarily taking in a poor girl who doesn't have a family to go to during Christmas." 

"I didn't have a family either, I turned out fine," Han responded defensively. Leia clearly begged to differ. 

"Well, too bad," she huffed, hands on her hips. "I already said she was welcome to stay here--"

Han almost choked. "You did _what_?!"

"--and guessing from how happy she was when I told her, she'll be here any day now." 

Before Han could argue further, they were interrupted by a sharp knock at the door. 

"That's not her, is it?" he hissed, panic evident in his expression. Leia just flashed a smug grin before going to answer the door, but her smile quickly disappeared when she saw it was not Rey standing on their doorstep. 

Head lowered, with a suitcase at his side, Kylo gave her a dry greeting. "Hello, mother." 

Walking up behind Leia to see what was going on, Han's jaw dropped. "Oh, for the love of..." His eyes shifted between his son and his wife, not knowing which one to address first. Questions started spilling out of him faster than he could think. "What the hell is going on? Why are _you_ here all of a sudden? Leia, did you know about this? What's the suitcase for?" 

Leia seemed to have lost her ability to speak. Kylo, meanwhile, brushed the snow off his coat and stepped inside the house, hardly caring if he was invited or not.

"I assume she didn't tell you about my visit a few weeks ago," he muttered, dragging the suitcase behind him into the foyer. "And I think it is clear what I'm here for. I need a place to stay."

Han threw his hands up with exasperation. "Of course you do. God knows you'd have to be desperate to---wait, _what_ visit?" Han turned to Leia sharply, who shot him a look of warning. 

"Han..." 

"Since when, in the past--" he stopped, trying to count something on his fingers before quickly giving up. "--whatever amount of years, has he been visiting?" 

"Just that one time, alright? I'll explain it later, so could you please _, shut up_ for five seconds?" she snapped back at him, then turned towards Kylo, who had been watching their bickering with a bitter, humorless smile. 

"Nothing has changed. What a surprise," he said emptily. "Home sweet home." 

Saying nothing further, he started up the stairs with his suitcase, which was only the first of many bags he would be bringing in from his car. As he walked down the hall towards his old bedroom, he could hear his parents' arguing recommence downstairs. Ignoring them strangely came easier to him than before, even though he hadn't had to tune out their screaming in several years. Perhaps he simply cared less now. 

Opening the door to the bedroom, he half expected it to be transformed into an exercise room or an office. But it wasn't. In fact, aside from the cleanliness that suggested someone had at least been dusting in there, it was practically untouched. Posters from embarrassing, out-of-style bands that he liked during high school still remained, clumsily taped to the blue walls. The single bed next to the window still had that tacky plaid comforter that Leia picked out for him ages ago. Her handiwork was also evident in the old clothes still hanging in his closet. As he pushed them to the back, a basketball jersey fell to the floor. He grimaced as he remembered being forced into the sport--apparently, just being tall was enough reason to think he'd be good at it. He wasn't.

Really, any sign of 'not fitting in' had been enough to make his mother consider calling a therapist. Han, of course, would have preferred sending him somewhere like boot camp. He almost did it too, after Kylo's first attempt at running away. Instead, Leia tried to force them all to go to family counseling. That, naturally, was a trainwreck. Leia couldn't stop questioning the therapist's methods, Han didn't take any of it seriously, and Kylo...well, he just refused to speak until everyone finally just gave up on him. 

_Just wait, all of that will come back. You thought it would go away when you graduated high school. You thought it would go away after your freshman year of college. But it never did. It doesn't matter how old you get, they will never, ever change._

He was shaken from his thoughts as Leia suddenly called up to him from downstairs. 

"Ben!"

Coming to the balcony overlooking the foyer, Kylo looked down at her with a glare. "Don't call me that. It hasn't been my name for years, not even legally, so stop using it." 

"In this house, it _is_ your name," Leia retorted, her voice now fully reverting back to the old 'parent tone'. "Anyway, I just think you should know, we'll be having a guest here soon..."

Taken aback, he curled his lip with disappointment, imagining the 'guest' was going to be some third cousin he barely remembered, or a weird friend of his parents. "Might I ask, who?"

"Well, I don't know if this will be good or bad news to you," she hesitantly started to say, before deciding to just blurt it out. "It's Rey."


	12. Chapter 12

Kylo's nightmare had quickly become a dream as he heard the news. Sure, Rey was angry with him now, but honestly, when had she _not_ been? That hadn't stopped her from sparring with him at the rec center, or spending basically all of her time talking to him at the Halloween party. That had to count for something, right? And here, in his parents' home, she would _have_ to play nice with him. Of course, he was not exactly thrilled about her hearing about whatever embarrassing stories from his childhood that Leia was bound to bring up, but it would be worth it if Rey was actually going to be _living_ with him. And oh God, she'd have to stay in the guest room—the one that was attached to his.

_She thought she could avoid this if she just refused to let me stay in her dorm…well, fate says otherwise._

All he could do now was hope she wasn't rude enough to tell Leia she'd changed her mind after she'd already agreed to this.

He'd been avoiding his parents for a good while, staying locked up in his bedroom just like he used to do, but hunger eventually forced him to go downstairs to find something to eat. Just as he expected, Han immediately noticed his presence and followed him into the kitchen.

"So you're unemployed, huh?" he asked, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed.

" _No,_ I still have my job as a GTA, it just doesn't pay enough for all the bills," Kylo corrected him. Frowning, Han seemed doubtful of that, but offered a suggestion rather than judgement.

"Well, why don't you go work with your mother? It'd be the exact same work, and I'm sure she'd love to have you around…"

Grabbing a frozen dinner from the freezer, Kylo sighed with annoyance. "I think I'll be spending enough time with her here as it is, thanks."

Leia, who had been in the next room unbeknownst to them, suddenly decided to come in and join the conversation. "No, no, I'll need the help. We always get more customers during the winter. Besides, after that whole fiasco with the recipes, I think it's the least you could do."

Kylo shot a furious look in Han's direction as if to say _, 'Now you've done it. Thanks a lot.'_ The last thing he wanted to do was work with his mother, who would probably be criticizing him the entire time, as well as his ex-employee and all of his little friends. Of course, it was another opportunity to spend even more time with Rey, but he wasn't sure if all of _that_ was worth it.

"I think you could find someone better for the job than me, really…"

"Well, you don't have a choice," Leia interrupted him, skipping the negotiations and taking charge as always. "It's the easiest and quickest job you can find, and you need one _now._ And as long as you're staying here, I want to keep an eye on you."

His patience now officially obliterated, Kylo sharply turned towards her. "You know what, this sort of thing is why I left in the first place. I'm already stuck here, why isn't that enough? Why is nothing I do ever enough-?!"

Unfazed by his anger, Leia was already rolling her eyes and clearly tuning him out before her phone started to ring. She motioned for him to be quiet and walked away a few feet before answering it. Kylo's fists clenched at his sides as he fumed, almost leaving the room before he remembered he hadn't gotten his food yet. As the frozen meal slowly heated up in the microwave, he decided to eavesdrop on Leia's phone conversation.

"Hello? Oh hi, sweetheart. Yes, of course, today is fine! After work? Okay, sure. Do you want us to help you move your things? It would be no problem, really!" Leia paused, nodding as if the person on the other line could see her. "Oh, ok. Yeah. Alright, see you soon. Bye-bye."

That had to be Rey. He couldn't remember the last time his parents had talked to _him_ like that. What were they doing, trying to fill the empty nest or something? Probably. He had always suspected his mother really wanted a daughter instead.

"Does she even know I'm here?" he asked as Leia walked back into the room. Putting her phone back in her pocket, Leia looked at him with confusion before realizing what he was talking about.

"Oh…well, no…but…"

"And you think that's a good idea?"

She sighed, glancing around to make sure Han was now safely out of earshot. "I figure if she's here, this might be more bearable for everyone. Remember how when we used to take vacations, your father would be a little more tolerable if we took someone else along? He's always more fun around other people. It's the same principle."

Kylo didn't seem convinced by her logic. "So you're using her."

"No, I invited her to stay with us before we even knew you'd be coming. After you two came to see me that day, I drove her back to her dorm—since _you_ just drove off and left her without a ride—" she reminded him with a glare. "And she said she wasn't going home for winter break because she had nowhere _to_ go. And it was always so lonely around here during Christmastime with just me and your father, so I thought…"

Kylo nodded, arms crossed over his chest. "You're replacing me, I get it. It's fine."

"No, of course not! But with the way you've treated us, it looks like you _want_ to be replaced!"

Now it was his turn to ignore her. Already halfway up the stairs, Kylo retreated to his bedroom once again, slamming the door behind him.

* * *

 

It had been weird, having only finals and no classes but still coming in to work. Some days, like today, Rey didn't have to wake up until past noon, and all she had to do was work the few hours until closing time. It was nice for now, but she knew her sleep cycle would be all out of whack when the spring semester started. As always, she walked from her dorm to work. It was only a couple of blocks, and she enjoyed the light exercise.

When she arrived at La Résistance, she found it completely dark and empty inside.

_That's weird…_

Tilting her head in confusion, she jiggled the knob, expecting it to be locked. But the door swung open with a low creak. Tentatively walking inside, she looked around to try and see if maybe Leia or someone was in the back office. Did something happen that she didn't know about?

"Hello..?"

All of a sudden, the lights came on, almost blinding her, and from behind the counter and the furniture, several people jumped out.

"SURPRISE! Happy Birthday!"

Rey almost screamed, a hand clutched over her heart as someone threw confetti over her and others blew paper party horns. As she caught her breath and realized what was happening, a huge smile quickly spread over her face.

"Oh my God…I didn't even know it was my birthday…!" she gasped, looking up on the wall to see 'Happy Birthday Rey!' spelled out in shiny, hanging letters. Next thing she knew, Finn and Poe were bringing out a cake with a big number '20' on it. Covering her mouth with her hands, Reyy shakily laughed, feeling her eyes start to sting from tears of joy. It was all so unbelievable. No one had ever done this for her before.

"Oh wow...this is too much, guys…" she struggled to find the right words to say, looking at all the people around her. Most were coworkers, some were friends from class that she supposed Finn had somehow gotten a hold of. She decided to throw her arms around him first in a grateful embrace. "Thank you so much!"

"You deserve it," he murmured sincerely. Rey went around the room and gave everyone else a hug before settling down at the big arm chair that was apparently designated for her. After blowing out the candles, the cake was cut and she had the first slice. As she took a bite, her eyes widened and she turned to Finn again with a smile.

"How did you know lemon is my favorite?" she asked, tongue running over her lips to get the excess icing. He shook his head and pointed to Poe.

"Actually, that one was his idea."

Poe grinned and shrugged, saying, "You just seem like the type who likes sour things."

"Well, you're right, I do!" After taking another bite, Rey looked around, realizing something. "Where's Leia?"

"Oh, she didn't come in today," Poe started to explain. "She wanted to be here for your party, but said something vague about family issues..."

Rey's smile faded immediately. She was pretty sure she knew what those "family issues" might be. But why wouldn't Leia tell her? She couldn't get out of it now, she'd already agreed…and she had honestly been looking forward to this. No, her one Christmas spent with an actual family would not be ruined just because _he_ was there.

"…but it didn't sound like an emergency, so it's probably nothing to worry about," Poe added reassuringly. Glancing over at Finn, Rey noticed he now looked a bit concerned as well. After people had stopped fussing over Rey so much, he leaned over to say something.

"I don't know if you should stay with Leia," he said quietly. "I mean, I haven't seen Ren over at First Order in _weeks_ , so I think he might have lost his job, and from what Leia said this morning—"

"He _has_ lost his job," Rey sighed. She had been avoiding talking to anyone about Kylo, but especially Finn. She knew about their history and there had been no point in upsetting him. But now, she felt he deserved to know what had been going on. "He got fired, and I guess couldn't pay his rent or something. He actually asked if he could stay with me—"

Hearing this, Finn looked like he was about to lose his mind. "Wait, _what?!_ "

She shushed him quickly, not wanting to make a scene. "I said no, of course! I mean, we've been talking, but _not_ in any way that should give him the impression he could move in with me. I don't know what he was thinking. But yes, I suppose he had no choice but to move in with his parents."

Finn's eyes were still wide with shock, and he was clearly horrified by this information, but at least he was keeping his voice low for now. "What do you mean, you've been talking?"

Rey opened her mouth to explain, but remembered she had promised that only Leia—and whoever Leia decided to tell—were to know about the 'Matt' ordeal. She could only imagine what Finn would do with that information.

"I'm sorry, I can't say. But I promise, it wasn't anything personal in the slightest." She didn't know why she felt like apologizing for this. Yes, Finn hated Kylo, but the only reason she'd been talking to him was purely to set things right. He'd done something wrong, and she'd made him fix it. That was all.

"Are you sure? From what I've seen, it's always been pretty personal on his end," Finn responded dubiously. "I barely saw you at that party—the one he also invited you to, remember? You even drove him home."

"He was drunk and I was just being nice. Really Finn, if anyone dislikes him as much as you, it's me." At this point, she wasn't quite sure she believed herself, but it seemed to convince Finn. He rubbed the back of his neck, looking down shamefully.

"Yeah, I guess you are nice to pretty much everyone. Even to people who don't deserve it," he smiled weakly. "But…if he is staying with his parents, I mean….you wouldn't mind being in the same house with him?"

"Of course I mind. I mind that she didn't tell me," Rey said admittedly, then sighed with resignation. "But I said I would. And I want something to do during the break aside from sit around in my dorm, playing Christmas carols and wrapping presents for myself…"

At Finn's look of shock and pity, she quickly added, "Relax, I'm kidding." _Sort of._ She usually just gave herself _one_ present. That was a difference.

"You could stay with me, you know. Maz has a spare bedroom," Finn offered.

 _Well, I_ _wish he had invited me before all of this,_ she thought. Remembering everything Finn had told her about his eccentric guardian, she chuckled a little. "Somehow, I get the feeling that would be just as weird…"

"Oh, well, yeah. Maz is an acquired taste," he agreed. "I'd try my best to limit the meditation sessions, but I can't do much about her freaky friends always being over."

Thus, the conversation shifted to lighter subjects, and pretty soon, Rey was back to talking to everyone else, receiving a few cards (some with money) and small presents from her closest friends. By the end of it all, both her stomach and wallet were nicely full, and she was ready to face the drive over to the Organa-Solo house.

* * *

 

Kylo was the nearest person to the front entrance when the doorbell rang. Before he even opened the door, he could see through the side windows that Rey was standing outside, with several bags in tow. His stomach flipped, but he was not sure whether it was from excitement or dread.

When he finally opened the door, Rey forced a smile and gave a little wave. "Hi."

Glancing over her slowly, he raised a brow. "You don't look surprised to see me…" he remarked with confusion, before his eyes drifted up to what looked like little pieces of colored paper in her hair. "Is that confetti?"

"She's here!" Leia's voice cheerily announced from inside the house, followed by Han muttering, "Oh, great..!" Shuffling up to the front door, the older woman started to help Rey with her bags.

"I forgot to tell you on the phone, happy birthday! And sorry I couldn't make your party, I figured it would be best if I stayed here for now…"  
"Thanks. And yeah, it's okay, I heard about the uh…" Rey struggled to find the right phrase. "Family stuff."

"Yes…I hope you don't mind him being here, he just showed up so unexpectedly," Leia said apologetically, clasping her hands and looking over at her son with an almost disappointed sigh. He glared daggers at her in return. Turning back to Rey, Leia continued, "If you want, you can have the master bedroom and me and Han will sleep upstairs in the guest room—"

Kylo was going to vehemently protest to that, but Rey beat him to it.

"No, no, it's alright. I'll be fine," she said, then flashed a sickeningly sweet smile in Kylo's direction. "I'm sure he'll be on his best behavior…"

He snorted, taking some of the luggage and following them upstairs. "It's my house, I'll act how I want," he huffed, straining to carry the weight of whatever it was in Rey's bag. "You're my guest, you should be on _your_ best behavior."

Despite the fact that he was clearly teasing, Leia was quick to reprimand him. "Ben, please. Stop harassing her."

"Yes, stop harassing me," Rey agreed. Just when Leia wasn't looking, she turned towards Kylo with a smirk and stuck her tongue out at him.

"Are you a child?" he hissed, but she just laughed. Only after Rey had settled some of her things at one of the lavatories did she seem to realize that the bathroom was shared. Through the other door, she could see just a little of what must be Kylo's room, and she swallowed nervously.

Rey quickly looked away from it when she realized he was watching her. Leaning against the wall with a smug grin, Kylo nodded as if answering a question she hadn't voiced yet. "Mmhm. Get ready for a whole month of this. Happy birthday to you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Yes, I threw in a few obligatory TFA lines because I could. Thank you sooooo much as usual for the comments, and I hope you enjoyed it.


	13. Chapter 13

It was a little past eight when Rey realized she hadn’t eaten anything except cake in hours, and her stomach’s growling was growing more obnoxious by the minute. She was just about to ask Leia if she could just eat an apple or something when Han suddenly approached.

“Hey kid, what’s your favorite place to eat?”

Biting her lip, she looked off to the left, trying to think. Honestly, she could eat anything from anywhere and be happy, especially now. “Uh, I’m not sure. Why?”

“I was just thinking, since it’s your birthday, we should celebrate,” he said with a shrug. Lowering his voice, he added, “Also, it’s my way of apologizing about all of this. I can’t believe Leia didn’t tell you about--”

She waved her hand dismissively and put on a smile. “Really, it’s not a big deal. I’m happy just being here.”

“Eh, well we’re taking you out anyway,” he said definitively, then stepped back. “So pick a place. You like burgers? Italian? Seafood?”

“Yeah, seafood would be great.” If Rey had to pick a favorite type of food, that would probably be it, if only because she rarely got to eat it. She knew it sounded silly, but she also enjoyed the atmosphere of most seafood restaurants, since it was the closest thing to the beach she’d ever been to. She’d never even been to an aquarium.

“I know the perfect place then,” Han said with a nod, then turned to call out to the rest of the house, apparently too lazy to just go and find Leia and Kylo. “Everyone, get in the car, we’re going to dinner!”

Once Rey had changed out of her work clothes and into something a bit nicer, all four of them piled into a grey and white truck in the garage. Rey had thought Kylo’s Mustang was beat up, and her own sedan was not in a much better state, but Han’s ancient vehicle brought a whole new meaning to ‘piece of junk’. He had to rev up the engine several times before it would even start, and Rey’s seatbelt refused to click into place. Watching her give up on it, Kylo was quick to make a suggestion.

“Move to the middle seat, it’ll be safer.”

She wrinkled her nose, being pretty sure she knew the real reason why he wanted her to move over. “Uh, I think I’ll be fine.”

“With the way Han drives, you might want to listen to Ben,” advised Leia from the front passenger seat turned to her husband. “Really, we could’ve just taken my car…”

“Yours is almost on empty, it wouldn’t make it to the restaurant,” he protested, pulling the car out of the driveway and onto the road. Rolling his eyes, Kylo leaned even further towards Rey, who had reluctantly shifted to the seat directly beside him.  

“Dad actually thinks this is the best damn car in the world, believe it or not.”

Han, who apparently had excellent hearing, whipped around and pointed an accusing finger at his son. “Hey, this _is_ the best damn car in the world, so show some respect!”

“Watch the road!” Leia barked, grabbing hold of the wheel until Han turned back around. “Do you want to kill us all?”

Kylo shot Rey a smug look. “See, seatbelts are necessary when the lunatic is driving.”

The rest of the drive was relatively peaceful, however, with only slight bickering in the front seat and awkward silence in the back. Rey was on her phone, responding to the flood of concerned texts that Finn had already sent her, whereas Kylo just stared out the window at the stars. When they finally arrived at the restaurant, which looked to be more of a dive bar/grill, Rey looked up towards the green neon sign glowing in the darkness and gasped.

“Wait, _this_ is Maz’s Place?”

Stepping out of the car, Han nodded. “Yep. Maz is the owner—gives me discounts.”

“Finn—you know, my friend from work—uh…his guardian of sorts, her name is Maz,” Rey started to explain, glancing over the crowded patio area. Drunken singing could be heard over the Marley song that was playing outside. “He said she had a restaurant, I guess this is it.”

“Small world, isn’t it…” Kylo commented in a deadpan as he walked past her. They had barely stepped inside when Rey suddenly noticed a little old woman had approached them. The stranger barely reached her shoulders, and peered up towards Han through huge spectacles.

_This must be Maz,_ thought Rey.

“Is that my favorite customer?” Maz asked, her voice giving away a slight accent. Glancing between Rey and Kylo, she pushed up her glasses and shifted uncomfortably closer to get a better look. “And who are these two?”

“This is Rey, she works for Leia. She was in one of my classes,” said Han, pointing a thumb towards her before motioning to Kylo. “And this one’s my son. Ben.”

As Rey could’ve expected, Han was quickly corrected on this. “Kylo.”

Han wasn’t going to give up that easily. “Ben.”

“Are you seriously going to do this right now?”

Watching them with amusement, Maz shook her head with a small chuckle and lead them all towards a table in the back. “Have a seat then, whoever you are.”

After Rey scooted towards the end of the booth, Kylo slid in beside her, so close that their legs were touching. She looked at him sharply, but he pretended not to notice.

As the next hour passed by, Rey barely said a word unless directly spoken to. Normally, any one of them would expect Kylo to feel like the outsider, but he was still technically part of the family. Rey couldn’t relate to any of the stories that were brought up, or inside jokes, or anything else for that matter. That was at least something amusing to watch, though. But more often than not, it was all passive-aggressive comments back and forth. The tension in that family was stifling. She didn’t know how any of them could stand it. Was this what a real family would be like for her, if she’d ever had one? Maybe this had been a bad idea, after all.

“Are you okay?” Kylo finally asked her in a low whisper. She’d noticed him glancing over at her every so often with a look of concern, but he hadn’t said anything until his parents were distracted by each other.

Nodding quickly, she forced a smile. “Yeah, I’m great.”

He didn’t look like he believed her. But what was she supposed to say, that she wasn’t happy when they were taking her into their home for an extended amount of time? That she wasn’t enjoying them treating her to this outing for her birthday? She wanted desperately to just be happy, but she needed a minute to collect herself first. So, she abruptly got up to take a breather in the restroom.

Realizing after a while that she had been gone a suspiciously long time, and that they might be worried about her, she pushed open the door to leave. She’d only taken a few steps when someone stepped in front of her, blocking her path. There stood an older, stocky man, wearing a tacky bucket hat and holding a beer. He was looking up and down Rey’s body, brazenly licking his lips as if he wanted to consume her.

“Well _hello_ there. Aren’t you a pretty one?”

“Not interested,” she sighed irritably, trying to walk around him, but he stopped her with his arm.

“Why not?”

Realizing this would likely be worse than a mere annoyance, she flinched back and swallowed, her eyes flitting about to try and find means of escape. The area at the back of the restaurant was dark and pretty much secluded. The stench of alcohol coming from the man and the leer in his eyes was enough to warn her to run, now. But no matter which way she shifted, he kept getting in her way.

“Where you going, lovely?” he snickered. “Can’t get away that easy.”

“Get out of my way, _now_ ,” she demanded, but he only laughed more.

“Oh-ho, real tough are you? I bet that makes you great in bed.”

She almost gagged at that. “You’re disgusting.”

Now narrowing his eyes, he curled his lip in a sneer. “You should learn to take a compliment.”

A _compliment?_ Rey wanted to kick his ass just for that vile comment alone, but she didn’t particularly feel like getting arrested tonight—or any night, really.

“I’m warning you. Move.” Her fingers curling into a tight ball, she had instinctively taken a fighting stance, but was honestly more likely to just scream if he tried anything. Just as her drunken assailant suddenly grabbed her by the waist to yank her closer to him, a voice called out from behind him, distracting him.

“Hey asshole.”

Looking over the man’s shoulder to see who it was, Rey had never been so relieved to see Kylo in her life. The moment the man’s head turned to look at him, a fist connected with his jaw, and the drunk tumbled backwards with a yelp. Rey moved out of the way just in time as he almost fell over, but just barely caught himself on the wall.

“Fuckin’ hell--!” he sputtered, wiping blood from his split lip before stumbling back to his feet and barreling into Kylo. As the two fell to the floor, they broke out into a full-on fist fight, and several people ran over to watch the chaos ensue. Despite the other man’s muscular build, his strikes were sluggish and misdirected in his intoxication, but he did manage to get one lucky hit directly over Kylo’s right eye. Screaming with rage and pain, Kylo flipped him over and started pummeling his fist into the other man’s face, over and over again.

_“Don’t! You! Ever! Fucking! Touch! Her! Again!”_

Shaken and shocked, Rey didn’t know what to do but stand there and watch until at last, a few other people came over and pried them apart. By the end of it, the man who had been harassing her was practically unrecognizable from all the swelling in his face and the blood gushing from his broken nose. Kylo looked much better by comparison, despite the purple bruise now forming from his right cheek up to his eyebrow.

Pushing through the crowd, Maz made a reappearance, disgust and disappointment evident in her expression. Pointing at the two of them, she made her orders very clear.

“Both of you! Get out, NOW.”

* * *

 

Kylo stared ahead dully with his one good eye as Leia’s incessant berating continued, even now as they were in the car on the way home.

“I can’t believe this. This is an all new low. I don’t understand, I didn’t raise you like this! You’ve become a complete _savage!_ An absolute barbarian!”

“Alright, just wait a second,” Han interrupted her unexpectedly. “That’s the first time I’ve seen him act like a man, so I for one, am proud.”

Kylo scoffed. “Wow, thanks Dad. If all I had to do was punch someone to make you proud, I would’ve done it ages ago.”

“Well, it would’ve been nice if it wasn’t in public,” Han said sternly. “And you have to be punching them for the right reasons—like defending the honor of a lady.”

Leia looked over at him with disbelief. “Please, what is this, the middle ages?”

“I would rather have hit him myself,” Rey snorted, then glanced over at Kylo. “Though I guess you doing it was almost as good. So thanks.”

Turning his head towards her, a hint of a smile showed on his lips. “Really?”

“Well, I mean, a ‘hey, leave her alone’ would have probably sufficed, but maybe he’ll think twice about harassing some other girl,” she shrugged. “But you’re always unnecessarily over-the-top, so I didn’t really expect anything different.”

Once home, Rey was actually the one who made an ice-pack for him. Looking at the time on his phone, he realized it was almost midnight—and he still hadn’t managed to do anything for Rey’s birthday, aside from getting a black eye for her. He had been thinking about this the whole time at dinner, but hadn’t been able to come up with any last-minute ideas. If only he’d known her birthday was coming up a few days earlier, then he was certain he’d give her something that would put everyone else’s gifts to shame. Something certainly better than whatever _Finn_ had gotten her.

His desperation had almost reached the point that he was going to try and consult his mother in private about it, when an idea hit him. It was a stupid idea, but it was better than nothing.

About a half hour later, he came up the stairs to find the door to the guest room closed. Knocking on it, he stood back and waited until Rey appeared, now dressed in her pajamas. Her hair was also loose, which he had rarely ever seen.

“Um…I just wanted to give you this,” he said, handing her a sloppily put-together bouquet of random flowers, tied together with a ribbon. “Sorry, it’s all I could manage at the last minute.”

Taken aback, Rey stared between him and the flowers, looking at them in puzzlement before hesitantly taking the gift. “Oh…thank you. They’re lovely. Wait, where did you get these?”

He just held up a finger over his lips, clearly trying to conceal a smirk. “Can’t say. Goodnight, Rey.”

“Goodnight…”

She watched him turn to leave before slowly closing the door again, then lifted the flowers up to her nose to inhale their subtle, natural scent. As she did, she couldn’t stop the huge smile from forming on her face.

That night, Rey tossed and turned, despite the bed being much more comfortable than the one in her dorm. Her sleep was disturbed by an unusual amount of dreams, all of which were extremely bizarre and vivid. All around her, it was raining pure darkness, or at least she thought it was, until she held out her tongue to taste it and realized it was…coffee? Strangely, all she was worried about was how it would stain her clothes. Starting to run, she tried to find shelter from the rain, but found herself running straight into someone’s chest. When she looked up, she saw Kylo. The rain had now turned into water, coming from a shower head. And…oh God. They were in the shower. Together. Naked. Touching. Lips inches away from each other. Just after the initial horror wore off and she realized this _might_ not be so unpleasant after all, the dream mutated again, thrusting her into a pitch black room. Somewhere nearby, she heard a hiss followed by a low humming. Looking over her shoulder to find the source of the sound, she caught sight of Kylo again, just as a crackling red beam of light sliced cleanly through his chest.

In the fuzzy background of her dream, she could hear someone frantically screaming. “NO! Ben!”

As Rey slowly found herself returning to consciousness and wondering what on earth she ate last night to make her dream about shower sex and weapons made of _light_ , she realized something. The screaming had _not_ just been in her dream, and it was now jarring her to a fully alert and startled state.

“ _BEN!_ What the HELL did you do to my flower garden?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah that was weird. And I know it's been like a day but I couldn't resist writing with all of this free time I have. Hope you enjoyed!


	14. Chapter 14

As Leia’s screaming continued, Kylo could barely get a word in to defend himself. Fortunately for him, it wasn’t long before Rey came rushing down the stairs, with last night’s gift in hand. Noticing that she hadn’t bothered to change out of a rather thin night shirt, he stared only a moment with his mouth slightly agape before averting his eyes. He didn’t want to give Leia another reason to smack him—especially on the right side, where his black eye was still healing.

“He got them for me. I’m so sorry, I should have known these were yours. Here,” Rey explained quickly, holding out the flowers towards Leia.

“Oh no, dear, it’s alright, you keep them. I can’t exactly just put them back where they were,” Leia sighed, looking over the cleanly cut stems of the flowers before turning back to her son. “At least he was trying to do something nice for once….But for God’s sake, Ben, I could’ve taken you to the store today to get her some better flowers if you had just waited!”

He shrugged. “Then it would be too late, it wouldn’t be her birthday anymore.”

Rolling her eyes, Leia pinched the bridge of her nose. “It isn’t a crime to give someone a gift a little late, alright, just…don’t do it again.”

“Yes, mother dear.”

She shot him a glare before stalking off, grumbling about how she’d have to buy new plants and start from scratch. Meanwhile, Rey didn’t seem too happy with him either.  
“Well, since my birthday is officially over, can you stop trying to be nice to me? Or just…find a normal way to do it?”

Raising a brow, he shifted closer, to the point he was only a few inches away. Rey was quick to increase this distance as he spoke. “I always heard women like flowers and having men fight over them. Should I change my technique?”

She groaned and turned away, arms wrapped tightly around herself. “You need to stop this. Seriously.”

“Why?”

Huffing with annoyance and turning back to him, she lowered her voice to explain the obvious. “I’m a student. You’re my teacher.”

“Not anymore I’m not. Semester is over,” he reminded her. “Oh, and by the way, I finished everyone’s final grades. You ended up with an A after all.”

She was clearly taken aback by this. Crossing her arms, she narrowed her eyes with suspicion. “Did you change my grades or something?”

He looked insulted at that accusation. “ _No_ , you’re just that good.”

“Wow. I was hoping for a low B at best,” she admitted. “Well, thank you, for making me ‘try harder’ or whatever, but I don’t think I’ll be taking anymore history classes, so…”

He snorted and shrugged. “That’s fine with me. At this point, I’d really prefer you _not_ be in my class.”

Clenching her jaw as she clearly understood what he meant by that, she muttered under her breath. “I could still report you.”

“For what? I haven’t done _anything_ ,” he said coldly. “You know, you keep threatening to take me down for this or that, but you never do it. Why is that? I think it’s because you don’t hate me half as much as you pretend to.”

She flinched back slightly, her eyes narrowed as she looked up at him with an expression he couldn’t decipher. Had he gone too far? Did she know he was right? Her silence was deafening. Finally, she relieved him with a response. “I never said I hated you. Sometimes, I…I _almost_ like you. But you always end up doing something that makes me regret that.”

With that, she turned to hurry back upstairs, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

* * *

 

Work was slow this morning, leaving only Finn and Poe at the counter, with Connix cleaning tables. Whenever a customer came in, Poe ended up doing most of the work. Finn had been _very_ preoccupied with his phone for the past couple of hours. And the night before.

As he received a new message, his eyes almost popped out of his skull with horror. “He gave her _flowers_? No, _no_ , hell no, I am _not_ comfortable with this...!”

Knowing exactly what Finn was talking about (since he hadn’t been able to shut up about it all day), Poe sighed and shook his head. “Why do you even care, man? You still like her?”

Huffing indignantly, Finn started typing out a text back to Rey at light speed. “No—I mean, maybe…but no, right now, I’m concerned for her safety. That man is a _psychopath_.”

 _I don’t know how he hasn’t been arrested yet. We_ all _know he’s got serious issues, and he’s been after her since day one, and now…?! Obviously, she’s in danger. Why isn’t anyone else worried? I am_ not _the crazy one!_  he thought furiously as he sent the text. He flinched as he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Relax, okay, she’s a grown woman,” Poe reminded him, giving his shoulder a subtle rub before dropping his hand again. Something about those dark eyes looking at him like that always had a way of calming Finn down. “Besides, aren’t they with his parents? I’m sure she’ll be alright.”

Leaning against the counter, Finn shrugged, still a little bitter. “Yeah, but they can’t be around to supervise all the time, I mean, what if—“

As he lifted his phone to check if Rey had responded yet, Poe put out his hand again, stopping him. “I promise you, she’s fine. She’ll be here in another hour or so and you’ll see that for yourself.”

* * *

 

Setting her phone down on the vanity, Rey padded over to the shower to turn on the faucet before undressing. She had only a couple of hours left before work and needed to get ready. Before heading out for the same reason, Leia had informed her about Kylo being pretty much forced to work at La Résistance, and Rey was none too happy about it. In responding to Finn’s constant check-ins, she decided against telling him about this new arrangement, knowing he would be even more upset than she was. There was hardly an hour that went by where he wasn’t asking if she’d been murdered yet.

 _Which is a silly question, since if I had been murdered, I couldn’t tell him that,_ she thought, stepping into the warm spray of water. Smiling slightly, she closed her eyes, just letting it fall over her for a moment. This shower was _so_ much nicer than the one at her dorm, which had the pressure of a fire hose and always seemed to be out of hot water. As she reached for the shampoo, which had some minty scent clearly intended for men, she remembered this wasn’t just her shower. Then, she found her mind returning to a similar scene from last night’s dream. Her first instinct was to shove the thought away, and she did, but the thought continuously kept worming itself back inside her mind. Biting her lip, she decided to entertain it as she continued washing. Brief though it was, that part of her dream had been admittedly enjoyable, and she had a strange curiosity to know what it would have been like if it hadn’t ended so quickly. This curiosity disturbed her, of course, but she had her reasons. She’d never denied Kylo was attractive _physically_ ; it was just everything _else_ about him that repulsed her. Besides, a dream didn’t mean anything, and it wasn’t _real_ , so what was the harm? It wasn’t like she’d act out on it anyway. A fantasy version of Kylo was probably much, _much_ different than who he really was.

After a few more minutes, she decided she had the idea out of her system and was ready to face the rest of the day at work, even if _he_ was there too. She was about to get out and dry off when she stepped on a slick part of the tile, and suddenly, her foot slipped out from underneath her, sending her flying back against the wall of the shower. Sharply crying out with pain as her head cracked against the wall, her unconscious body crumbled to a heap on the shower floor.

When she opened her eyes again, her head was throbbing, and it felt like there were daggers stabbing her all down the side of her leg and on her right arm. When she tried to move it, she screamed with agony.

“Hold on, I’ve got you…”

It was only then that she looked up and realized she wasn’t alone. The door, previously closed and locked, had been kicked open, and Kylo was crouching over her. Apparently, he was trying to pick her up. She gasped and immediately moved to cover herself, squirming away from him.

“What the hell are you doing, get out!”

“I’m trying to help you! Stop moving so much, you’ll hurt yourself!” He groaned as he finally managed to lift her out of the tub, still holding onto her with one arm as he reached for a towel with the other. “Can you stand?”

As he started wrapping the towel around her, she tried to steady herself on both legs before quickly stumbling back just on the right one, whimpering with pain. “I—no! Ow…oh God, it hurts…”

“We’re going to a hospital, right now.” She was already lifted off the ground and into his arms before she could protest, but as he started carrying her out the door, she started clawing the air for something.

“Wait a damn second, alright! I am not going _anywhere_ dressed in a TOWEL!”

Despite the fact that dressing herself with a two possibly broken limbs was an agonizing nightmare, Rey refused to let Kylo turn around, let alone help her, until she was covered. All she managed to get on was a t-shirt and some athletic shorts, and literally nothing else, but it would do for now.

After carrying Rey downstairs and out to his car, Kylo started to try and help her with the seatbelt, but was swatted away.

“And they call me ungrateful,” he muttered, shutting the door for her anyway and walking around the car to get in the driver’s seat. As they started to drive off, Rey grit her teeth, trying desperately not to scream. But it was hard not to whenever the car would go over a sharp bump in the road, or swerve too quickly, putting pressure on any of her sore spots.

“Slow down! I’m not in labor, alright, you don’t have to speed,” she hissed, cradling her wounded arm.

“Oh, I’m _so_ sorry for being concerned,” he snapped. “You know, next time you fall, I’ll just leave you there if you’re going to be like this.”

Glaring at him, she pushed on as he sped around another corner. “Then _I’m_ so sorry that I didn’t want _you_ to see me naked! Why didn’t you just call for Leia or something?”

“She already left, and if she was there, I doubt she could lift you. And really, you’d be more comfortable with your boss seeing you naked than me?” he scoffed. As traffic slowed, his nails dug into the wheel with impatience. “Oh come on…”

Rey shrugged. “Well yeah, given your not-so-subtle feelings—“

“As great as it was finally seeing you in the nude, I wasn’t exactly _focusing_ on that when I didn’t know if you were even going to wake up again, so get over your modesty already!”

“Stop screaming, I have a migraine—“

 “I’m not even screaming, and _I’m_ about to have a migraine if this jackass in front of me won’t speed up,” he fumed, swerving out into the other lane to pass the other car without even looking to see if anyone was coming.

A split second later, a truck plowed straight into the left side of the Mustang, sending it spinning out into the intersection, sparks flying behind it as metal scraped against concrete. Frantic screaming could be heard from the inside before there was dead silence. Her vision blurry and her entire body aching, Rey looked around in shock and confusion, slowly taking in the chaos. It looked like the truck mostly got the front engine, and smoke was pouring out of its demolished remains, but the passenger side of the car was practically untouched. Looking over towards Kylo before herself, she could see that he was conscious, but there was blood everywhere. The crash had shattered his window, and shards of glass were imbedded all over his skin.

It didn’t take long for the ambulance to arrive, picking up where they left off on their journey to the hospital. Rey, now recovered from her initial shock, was of course glad they were both alive—but that didn’t stop her from being furious with Kylo for almost getting them killed.

Looking over at her from the other gurney, he weakly tried to explain himself. “I was…just trying to help you.”

She snorted. “Yeah? Good job.”


	15. Chapter 15

"So you slipped in the shower…"

"Yes."

"And _then_ , got in a car accident on the way here?" the doctor asked, raising a brow.

"Yes, thanks to him." Rey sighed and looked over at the bed next to her, where a nurse was still pulling out the glass from Kylo's skin. Most of the big shards had been removed already and the cuts were stitched up, but there was still a lot of painful work to be done about the little pieces.

"Did he slip in the shower _with_ you?"

Feeling the redness rising to her face, she sputtered, "W-What? _No,_ why would you think that?"

The doctor raised a brow and looked over at the other, bloodier patient. "His black eye. It doesn't look fresh enough to somehow come from the car crash."

"Oh no, he got _that_ in a fight last night. In a restaurant. On my birthday," Rey said, her words tight but with a huge sarcastic grin plastered on her face. In the bed beside hers, Kylo groaned with pain and exasperation.

"I was defending you from a predator, _sue me_!"

Smirking a little, Rey turned back towards the doctor, lowering her voice. "He's right, I'm just giving him a hard time."

"He seems to be having a hard enough time as it is," the man commented as he wrote down more notes, heading towards the door. "I'll be right back."

"Can we use the phone?" Rey asked the nurse as soon as the doctor left. "I left mine at the house and his…"

"Destroyed in the crash. Not that I ever used it anyway—Aah!" Kylo spasmed and cursed as the nurse pulled out a deeply imbedded shard from his thigh. Getting up and changing gloves, the nurse headed over to grab the phone.

"Sure, who are you calling?"

"La Résistance café."

The nurse gave Rey a strange look, hesitating to hand over the phone. "If you want coffee, we have a café in the lobby…"

"She wants to call my mother," Kylo explained, rolling his eyes. Glancing between them slowly, the nurse looked even more confused.

"Yourmom….Are you siblings?"

They replied at the same time and with equal force. "No!"

"Cousins?"

Rey groaned. "We _aren't_ related, I'm just staying in his house."

Tilting her head, the nurse put a hand on her hip. "So you're a couple."

"No!" Rey denied, just as Kylo vigorously nodded. Shooting him an indignant glare, she tried to shove him, but the bed was too far away for her to reach.

"We're almost there, it's just happening slowly," he sighed wistfully. "Very, very slowly…"

"Wait a sec—" the poor employee started to speak, but Kylo cut her off with an exasperated shout.

" _Can you just give her the damn phone already?!"_

* * *

It was not long before everyone arrived—literally, everyone. Rey had meant to call Leia just to let her know what had happened and to request being picked up whenever the hospital would release them. But not an hour later, and Mrs. Organa arrived, bringing Finn and Poe along with her.

"They overheard me on the phone at work and insisted on coming," Leia shrugged as the boys pushed past her towards Rey. Both of them, at first, were only asking questions about her well-being and how it all had happened, but as she explained, Finn especially started to redirect his attention towards Kylo.

"So _that's_ why he's here," he said to himself, then started snickering as he looked over the other man's injuries. "Oh my God, your _face_ …!"

"If you want to keep yours intact, I suggest you shut up," snapped Kylo, turning his head away and clearly wanting to disappear. But since he was helpless in a hospital bed, Finn wasn't about to back down now.

"I'm glad you got most of the damage," he continued, looking down at Ren with judgment in his eyes. "You've had it coming for a long time, but after doing this to Rey—"

"What she _conveniently_ forgot to tell you was that most of her injuries came from slipping in the shower, not from the accident which only happened because I was trying to get her here as fast as possible," Kylo said, leaning in closer towards the other man before lowering his voice to a whisper. "Besides, _I_ got to see her naked, and _you_ didn't. But by all means, continue to gloat. I've known for months now that she…hm, how do I put this… _'just wants to be friends'_?"

Backing away slowly, Finn opened his mouth as if he was going to say something equally scathing, but seemingly decided Ren wasn't worth it. Clenching his fists at his sides, he stood back and remained quiet as the others continued to talk, mostly about how they would sort it out with the other driver—who thankfully, sustained only mild injuries. Meanwhile, a cold smile revealed itself on Kylo's wounded face, knowing he got under the enemy's skin, even if Finn was trying to hide it now.

Just then, everyone turned to look as another visitor burst through the door: Han. Leia crossed her arms and sighed as she walked towards him.

"There you are, finally. I've been calling…"

"Sorry, traffic was hell. There was a certain _wreck_ on the highway over here, you know. Looked a lot like Ben's car," Han said dryly, feigning ignorance about the situation before looking over at his son with a long sigh. " _Really,_ kid? Can't you stay out of trouble for a few hours, at least?"

* * *

Rey, officially having a mild concussion and a fractured femur, as well as seriously painful bruises all down her arm, was allowed as much time off from work as she needed. Leia was not so lenient with Kylo. He had a week off, tops. Then, with no car on his own, he really would have no choice but to ride with his mother to work. It was like he was going back in time further and further, becoming less of an adult and more of a dependent child every day—it was a straight-up Benjamin Button nightmare. But at least Rey was there.

As they healed, they found themselves spending a lot of time on the couch watching Netflix. There wasn't much else to do when one could barely move without wanting to scream. But even after Kylo's cuts sealed up and he felt more alright than he looked, he continued joining in with whatever Rey was watching—even if it was some dull pawn show. He could never understand why she found that sort of thing interesting. Leia sometimes joined them on her time off, but when she wasn't present, Kylo situated himself closer to Rey. She pretended not to notice.

After realizing subtlety wasn't going to work, he came up with another idea. "We should do something different."

Rey paused the show they were watching to look up at him. "Like what?"

He pretended to think for a moment, giving a little shrug as he stood up, starting to look around. "I don't know, I think my dad has a deck of cards around here somewhere….We could play poker."

She made a face at that. "I haven't played that in a _long_ time."

_So she probably isn't good at it,_ he thought, trying not to smirk. _Excellent._ Turning back to her with the deck in hand, he sat down in front of the coffee table and distributed the cards. "It's not that hard, I'm sure you'll remember how to play soon enough."

The first round, while she was still rusty on the rules, he beat her easily. After that, he purposefully ignored his higher cards and made weak hands, allowing her the chance to start winning easier and easier.

"Are you _letting_ me win?" Rey asked, looking up from her cards suspiciously. He glanced back with feigned innocence.

"Hm? No, you're just good."

It was hard to tell whether or not she bought the act. Yawning and leaning back, she put her cards down. "Well, are you bored of losing yet?"

The moment he'd been waiting for. "Why, are you bored of winning? Let's make it more interesting, then. _Strip_ poker."

Narrowing her eyes, Rey shook her head and stood up, apparently done for now. "Nice try Kylo, but I really don't care to have you see me naked again."

"Hey, you're winning, aren't you?" he protested. "I'd be lucky just to get your shoes off."

She glanced over him a moment before sighing and sitting back down to shuffle the cards. "Well alright, if you're so desperate to lose your clothes…"

Kylo had to bite his tongue to keep from giving her a snarky comeback that would ruin his plan. The moment they started playing, he gave it his all, not allowing her even the slightest chance of winning.

Except she did—the first four rounds. He only had his shoes and socks removed, but he was already feeling the embarrassment start to creep in. Why was he losing? The only reason she was winning earlier was because he was going easy on her…right?

"Ready to give up yet?" she taunted him, laying out another hand of cards. "I win again."

Muttering curses under his breath, he grasped the edges of his shirt, pulling it over his head before tossing it to the side. "Happy?"

Rey didn't say anything. She just stared a moment before speaking.

"Where did you get that?" she asked, motioning towards his abdomen. At first, he raised a brow and looked down, unsure what she was talking about until he saw the raised burn mark.

"Oh this, I almost forgot about it…"

She tilted her head, smirking a little. "Did you get it in another one of your brawls?"

"Yes, a brawl with the stove," he said dryly. "Never cook shirtless."

"At least you have a cooler story to go along with your hundreds of new scars—even if they are tiny."

"Eh. I don't think most of these will stick around."

"Maybe this one will," she said, leaning forward to trace the thin mark on the side of his face. It was only a few centimeters in length but the cut had clearly been deeper than the others. He didn't realize he was holding his breath until she withdrew her hand again.

"What about you? Have any scars that aren't from the crash?"

She shrugged, looking away and rubbing her arm. "I'm not sure I even have any from the crash. The glass didn't really get to me."

"Surely you have at least one from _somewhere_ ," he pressed on, looking over her slowly. As he did, he noticed one on her upper thigh. It was normally covered, but with her legs crossed, her shorts had ridden up more than usual, showing a small, circular indention in her skin. He opened his mouth to ask, but quickly closed it again, as he thought of what the scar might have come from. Noticing him staring at it, she quickly pulled her shorts back over the mark.  
"Cigar burn," she muttered quickly. "No big deal. It happened ages ago."

"That doesn't just happen by accident..."

She looked away, her expression blank. Just when he thought she wasn't going to say anything, and that he should change the subject, she spoke up again. "All foster homes suck, but the last place I had to stay was extra shitty. Honestly, the workload was worse than this little burn. Just be glad you didn't have to grow up in the system."

Before he could say anything, or even process this, he heard the mechanical sound of the garage door opening. "She's home," he groaned with disappointment. He had planned it all out so carefully, but in the end, all he did was embarrass himself and somehow end up on the _worst_ subject possible with Rey—and now his time alone with her was over again.

He barely remembered to put his shirt back on before Leia came through the door.

"Oh, you mixed it up today. Cards instead of Netflix," she commented as she walked into the den, then looked over towards Rey. "How would you feel about going with us to see my brother this weekend?"

"Mr. Skywalker?"

Kylo was quick to jump in. "He was her _professor_ , I think it's a bit weird to have her spend the weekend with—"

"Oh be quiet, Ben, like you're one to talk," Leia dismissed him, looking between them with a sigh before continuing. "We haven't seen Luke in a long time, and it's always so hard to get him to come over here…and it'd be nice to get out of this house. You two haven't been outside in days."

" _Mother,_ we're convalescing for God's sakes…"

"I'd love to go," Rey cut him off. "I'm kind of tired of sitting around too."

Clasping her hands together, Leia beamed. "Great! It'll be fun, he has this cabin out in the middle of the woods—really lovely around this time of year…"

Kylo wanted to die.

* * *

"Almost there—a little further….can you push a bit more?"

"I can't push any harder!"

"Wait, I got it…okay, perfect!" Poe stepped back as the tree was set into place in the corner of the room. Coming out from behind the branches of the evergreen, Finn caught his breath, using his shirt to wipe the sweat from his brow. When Poe had asked him for help setting up a Christmas tree in his family's cabin, he had thought there'd be more people involved to help out. Apparently not. At least Poe had done most of the work cutting the tree down, though.

"We can take a break for a while before decorating it," said Poe, crouching down beside the stone fireplace to turn on the gas before getting a spark going. Finn, meanwhile, collapsed on the couch.

"You have to decorate it too?"

"Well yeah, everyone else keeps putting it off, so I figured I'd just do it myself this year." Straightening back up as the fire started, he came over to sit on the couch with Finn. "Mom hasn't even gotten around to setting up the tree at home yet."

"You normally have _two_ trees, one at your house and one here?" Finn scoffed and shook his head. "Man, I wish. Maz never decorates for holidays. She just gives me some money like 'Here, go buy yourself something you like, you know yourself best' or whatever."

Poe frowned. "That's kinda sad. Now I feel like I have to get a present for you."

"Nah, this is enough of a present." Finn paused after this, unsure if he should have said it like that. "I mean, it's nice to hang out with you. Even if you are making me do manual labor."

"Hey, you agreed!"

"I know, I know, I'm kidding…it's actually a little fun. Since I've never gotten to have the whole Christmas experience before," he continued with a small smile. They were quiet for a moment before he got up. "Alright, I've caught my breath. Let's get this decorating thing over with."

Poe pulled out a box from the closet full of ornaments and handed them to Finn, who hung them up around the branches of the tree. Occasionally, Poe would explain where one came from—usually the brass ones with names and dates engraved on them. After a few minutes of this, Finn felt like he knew the name of every member of Poe's family.

"What's this one from?" he asked when he found a golden bauble with two names: Poe's, and someone else's that he hadn't seen on any of the others.

"Oh—that one's actually from my ex-boyfriend…" Poe said, biting his lip. "I don't know why I still have it, I should've thrown it out ages ago."

"Did things end badly?"

Poe shrugged. "Don't most relationships?"

"Guess you don't want me to hang it up, then." Finn handed the ornament back to him, which he promptly trashed. As he walked back into the living area, Finn looked over him hesitantly, having something on his mind but not knowing whether or not he should bring it up. It didn't take long for Poe to notice.

"Is something wrong?"

"No, I just…" Finn felt his heart start to beat erratically in his chest, the way it did when he was about to take a test he didn't study for. "You know, that thing that happened—I mean, the thing that we don't talk about…"

Poe raised a brow. "What?"

"You know, when I came over to your house for the first time, and…" He couldn't force himself to spell it out much further than that, but thankfully, the other man seemed to understand.

"Yeah, yeah, I got it…" Poe sighed, crossing his arms and looking away. "What about it?"

Taking a deep breath, Finn tried to ignore the part of him that was screaming for him to stop talking, forcing himself to continue. After days of just letting the thought roll around in his head, he'd decided on impulse that it was time to share it.

"I've been thinking about it a lot lately. I don't know why, really, I've just felt different…about that happening."

Poe looked over him skeptically. "What do you mean? Are you confused or something?"

Cringing, Finn turned away, immediately regretting his decision. "I don't know, maybe. Never mind, I shouldn't have brought it up."

"No, it's something that's bothering you. You can talk to me, I mean…we're friends, aren't we?"

Turning back to look at Poe, Finn swallowed, keeping his eyes averted. "There's not much else to say. I don't know what to do about it."

"Well, I can't tell you what you should do. Only you can figure that out for yourself." After a moment of tense silence, Poe's phone started going off. Taking it out from his pocket, he looked at the screen for a second before his eyes widened.

"Who is it?" Finn asked, but Poe shook his head.

"No one's calling, it's a weather alert. There's going to be a blizzard."


	16. Chapter 16

Rey was extremely excited about this trip. It might be a little weird, cramped in a small cabin with this strange, dysfunctional family, but that didn’t outweigh the positives. For one thing, this was about the closest thing to camping she’d ever done, and she always loved the outdoors. And as she helped Han and Leia pack their belongings in the car outside, she saw there was already a few extra inches of snow on the ground. Most people in Starkiller were sick of the constant cold, but with her only recently moving in from the hottest and driest city imaginable, Rey was still in awe of it.

Kylo, not surprisingly, had a different perspective. She’d known from last night he wasn’t too pleased about the trip, but she didn’t think he would look quite as pissed off as he did that morning. Glancing over him hesitantly as he threw his bags in the car, Rey crossed her arms. “You aren’t _that_ upset about seeing your uncle, are you?”

He didn’t look at her, just going back upstairs to get more luggage. “I’m fine.”

Leia, walking in from the garage, put a hand on Rey’s shoulder. “Oh, he’s just upset because it’s his birthday.”

Rey’s eyes widened, a look of confusion and surprise on her face. “What? Why didn’t he tell—“

“His _thirtieth_ birthday.”

“Oh,” Rey frowned. He did suddenly seem much older in her mind than he did yesterday. “Are we going to do anything for him, or…?”

“I asked him last night. He doesn’t want anything. Typical.” Sighing, Leia gave a gesture of exasperation, glancing back towards the stairs as her son came back down with more bags. Rey found that rather unusual—she thought most men brought only one bag for a weeklong trip, not five for just a few days.

_Two of them are probably full of hair products,_ she thought with a smirk.

Once they were all piled in Han’s poor excuse for a vehicle, Rey decided to breach the apparently touchy subject with the surly man sitting beside her.

“So, I heard it was your birthday…”

He shot a look at her out of the corner of his eye, but said nothing. She’d have to push his buttons more than that if she wanted a response.

“I would’ve gotten you black balloons and a tombstone cake if I’d known. You’d have a very lovely funeral,” she teased, nudging him in the side a little.

Gritting his teeth, he seethed. “Yes, it’s hilarious, I’m officially old and yet I’m still being forced like a _child_ to tag along on this idiotic trip…”

Leia reached around to smack him on the shoulder. “Children, play nice!”

“See what I mean?!” he hissed, looking towards Rey with the most death-filled glare she had _ever_ seen from him--which was saying a lot, since he was pissed most of the time.

“Relax, it’ll be fine,” Rey tried to calm him down, then leaned over, lowering her voice. “We’ll sneak away from them as much as possible, alright? Just for you.”

He seemed to perk up a little at hearing that.

Once they pulled up at the cabin, Luke came outside to greet them almost immediately. Rey found it odd, seeing her former professor like this, as it was almost noon and he was still in a night robe. After hugging and talking to Han and Leia for a few minutes, he looked towards Rey with curiosity.

“Rachel, right?” She couldn’t really expect him to remember her name, she was only one out of hundreds of students. And he had only been in class to teach maybe half the time—the other half was all on Kylo.

“It’s Rey,” Leia reminded him quickly. Luke chuckled a little with embarrassment, shaking his head.

“Oh, sorry, I’ll remember it this time…Good to see you, though, you were one of my better students, I think….And Leia was going on and on about what a pleasure it was to have you stay with her.” Turning back to the others, a little half smile tugged at his lips as he noticed Kylo, who was the last to get out of the car. “I see you actually managed to bring along my favorite nephew…”

Rey beamed, eager to bring up the news. “It’s his birthday.”

Rolling his eyes, Kylo elbowed her in the side, harshly whispering. “He _knows_ it’s my birthday, you don’t have to tell him that—“

“Actually, I forgot,” Luke shrugged. “But happy birthday anyway.”

Rey had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing at Kylo’s expression. For someone who hated his birthday so much, he certainly looked rather offended to see it had been forgotten. Though finding it funny, she had to admit it was sort of sad as well. Finn and Poe had remembered _her_ birthday and they weren’t even family.

Luke’s cabin was larger inside than it appeared on the outside, and had an excellent view of the mountains. There was a spacious den and kitchen area, as well as three bedrooms, including the master. Rey knew she shouldn’t feel so surprised--Skywalker was a professor after all. If he couldn’t get a fancy house in the richest neighborhood like Leia, he could at least afford an equally nice cabin outside town. But for some reason, she just had the idea of a tiny little shack in mind. She was glad to see that wasn’t the case.

But the set up _did_ leave one person without a bedroom. She decided to take one for the team.

“What are you doing?”

Rey turned to look at Kylo with a questioning brow as she was putting her things next to the couch. “Just putting my things down. Why?”

“You’re sleeping on the sofa?”

“Well, I wasn’t going to make you do it on your _birthday_ ….” She smirked, enjoying the face he made when she reminded him of it. But he could make equally discomforting comments.

“Seems like a waste, I mean, my room has a perfectly good _double_ bed—“

“Absolutely _not_ ,” she cut him off cold, shaking her head. Rolling his eyes, he just went back to carrying his own bags upstairs to his room. For a moment, she watched him go, briefly entertaining the absurd idea he brought up. She hadn’t shared a bed with anyone since her foster days, and that had only been with other girls her own age. She didn’t even have a roommate on campus—personal space and privacy were _very_ important to her. But aside from certain implications it brought, the thought of having someone nearby, maybe even holding her, while she slept was admittedly a nice one. Getting back to sleep after having a nightmare would especially be easier if she wasn’t alone. However, she wasn’t naïve. If she said yes to one thing, he’d expect more.

It didn’t take long for her to finish unpacking her things. After the initial settling in, Luke gravitated towards Han and Leia to catch up on old times, leaving the younger guests to sneak away as planned earlier. It wasn’t so much sneaking out as informing Leia they were going out, only for her to wave dismissively, probably not even hearing them.

Now trudging outside in the snow behind Rey, Kylo had once again, started complaining. “So hiking is your idea of _fun_?”

“Would you prefer to sit and listen to your parents go on about their glory days?” she glanced back at him and snorted as he shook his head. “Didn’t think so. Besides, it isn’t just hiking, we have a destination.”

“We do?”

“It’s a secret.” She knew she wouldn’t convince him to come along with her if she told him. Thankfully, he decided to play along with her game, not questioning her further. After a few minutes of walking, the wind started to pick up. The needles of the evergreens rustled as icy air and snowflakes blew through the forest.

“Rey…maybe we should do this tomorrow?”

“No, we’re almost there, it’ll be fine…” she insisted, pushing on through the snow. Only then did she get the weather alert.

 

* * *

 

Finn was officially panicking. “No, no, _no!_ I can’t be trapped here! How long is this going to be?” He had come over here expecting to stay a few _hours_ , he hadn’t thought to even bring his wallet, let alone survival gear.

“Just a few days, at most,” Poe assured him. “Look, it won’t be that bad, we have everything we need here. Food, shelter, phone chargers, beer—it’ll be okay.”

“What kind of food, is it like rations for the zombie apocalypse?”

Poe snorted and shook his head. “Nah, more like canned spaghetti.”

Giving a small shrug, Finn relaxed, as he supposed he could work with that. He’d had to survive on worse before, but that was long ago for him. Taking out his phone, he called Maz to let her know what had happened, but she didn’t pick up. She was probably out doing some illegal activities with her bar friends. Rolling his eyes at that thought, Finn left a brief message before hanging up and turning to Poe.

“So what are we going to do?”

Glancing around with feigned boredom, Poe sighed. “Hm, I don’t know, two guys stuck in a secluded cabin all weekend—Oh relax, Finn, I’m kidding. Don’t look so horrified.”

It was actually more of embarrassment Finn was feeling, but he forced a laugh anyway. “I knew that…”

“How do you want to pass the time? The T.V. doesn’t have cable or anything anymore, the bill was a bit more expensive than it was worth, but I think we have movies somewhere. Old VHS tapes, I mean…” Poe said, getting up to look around. “I don’t even remember what we have, it might just be weird home videos or something.”

“We could play a game,” Finn suddenly suggested. Poe turned to face him, a brow raised.

“Yeah? What kind of game?”

Finn gave a nonchalant shrug. “You know, just time-killing games. Twenty questions, truth or dare, never have I ever…”

Snorting, Poe crossed his arms, looking at Finn strangely. “Are we in middle school?”

“Hey, you do childish things all the time, you aren’t one to judge,” Finn defended himself with a teasing smile. At work, Poe was always making the most immature jokes, especially when he was bored. Sometimes he’d resort to pranking people, but he wasn’t very good at it. Finn always heard him trying not to laugh before jumping out from behind a corner.

“Ah, fine. Never have I ever it is. But we’ll need beer for this.”

For the first few rounds, it was a mostly innocent game, involving things like ‘Never have I ever gone skydiving’ or ‘never have I ever been arrested’. Half an hour later, and Finn was buzzed enough to start making things a little more _interesting._ “Never have I ever…had a one night stand.”

Poe shot him a look before slowly putting a finger down and taking another sip of his drink. Snorting, Finn shook his head. “I’m not even surprised.”

Rolling his eyes, Poe leaned back into the couch, clearly trying to think of a good one to say. “Never have I ever kissed a girl.”

“Oh come on, that’s a cheap shot,” Finn whined, then furrowed his brows with interest. “ _Never,_ not even like out of…peer pressure or something?”

“Nope.”

 “Hm. Well then, never have I ever kissed a _boy_ —while sober,” he quickly added this last part, then waited expectantly as Poe did nothing for a moment. “What? Come on, you just said—“

“Kidding.” Poe put another finger down, and was officially out of the game. “I definitely don’t have to be high to do it.”

The way he said this wasn’t rude or bitter, but it still got to Finn a little. And he was terrible at hiding his feelings, especially after he’d had a few. “Well…since my inexperience won _this_ game, how about truth or dare?”

Poe bit his lip, barely hiding a grin. “Alright. But just so you know, you aren’t sly.”

“What?”

“You don’t have to use a _game_ to get me to kiss you. If you want to try it again, like you were _heavily_ implying earlier….just do it,” he said, then held up a hand, adding, “Though you might want to wait until you’re sober again.”

“I’m only a _little_ tipsy—and it’s different if I’m going in with a purpose…” Finn looked down, trying to push away that feeling of his heart hammering again. “I don’t want you to feel like I’m using you though. I wouldn’t try this with _anyone_ just because I want to experiment or something. I’ve only been wondering about it because of you, and I like you, so…”

Poe smiled faintly. “It’s fine. I’m not too proud to be someone’s experiment, as long as I _know_ that’s all it is. And as long as we’re still friends afterwards—like before.”

“Yeah, still friends. Of course.” Nodding quickly, Finn took a breath, trying to muster up every ounce of courage he had in him to _just go for it_ already. He’d barely started to lean in, feeling absolutely terrified but in a strangely good way, when something suddenly slammed against the window behind Poe, almost shaking the entire cabin. Through the frosted glass, all he could see was a huge black shadow.

“OH MY GOD!” Leaping back and grabbing Poe without even thinking, Finn tried to pull him away from the window as fast as possible. “What the fuck is that!? Is that a bear or something?! Please tell me you have a gun somewhere in here—“

Poe looked almost as frightened as Finn for the first couple of moments, glancing around for a weapon, when he looked back to the window to see nothing was there.

“Where did it go?”

There was loud thud against the wall, then another, slowly moving towards the front door. Finn started to panic. “Quick, lock the door, it’s going to come in--!”

Poe rushed towards the entrance, but the door swung open before he could get to it. Now they could tell that it was not in fact a bear, but a person, covered from head to toe in heavy, black snow gear. All in all, it looked like someone who was about to murder them with an axe. Finn shrieked at the top of his lungs. Just as he grabbed the poker from the fireplace to defend himself, he heard laughter. Familiar, female laughter. Finn watched in angry disbelief as Rey stepped out from behind the tall figure in the doorway.

“Rey? What the _hell?_ Who is that—?!“

“I’m sorry guys, really, I tried to stop him but it was so funny…” she tried to speak between laughs, reaching up to snatch off the goggles and ski mask from her companion. Kylo shot her a glare, brushing the snow off himself.

“You didn’t even let me get to the good part...”

“The good part where you would’ve gotten yourself stabbed with a fire poker? Yeah, I’m so sorry for saving your life…!”

Meanwhile, Finn turned to Poe, feeling exasperated with himself. “I completely forgot I texted her. I invited her over like an hour ago and she didn’t say anything, so I assumed she wasn’t coming--let alone with _him,_ ” he muttered, glancing towards Kylo with a look of hatred. Why did he have to ruin **everything?** First with Rey, and now…

“It’s alright, I’m sure we’ll have plenty of alone time later. I mean, they aren’t planning on staying for long, right?” Poe asked, a hint of worry in his eyes. Finn let out a deep breath.

“No, no, she says she’s staying at a cabin close by. It’s like his uncle’s place or something, not sure why she’s there…” He saw Rey looking at him out of the corner of his eye, and quickly stopped there, putting on a smile.

She glanced between them as if suspecting something before breaking out into a grin as well. “So…what are we going to do?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the very late update! Hope you liked it.


	17. Chapter 17

“How’ve you been?” Poe asked Rey as he offered her a beer. “Apparently you’ve recovered well enough to be walking through the woods during a _blizzard_ …”

She laughed and took the beer, popping it open with a small shrug. “Yeah, we just took it easy for a long time. I really wanted to get back out and do stuff again.”

“Speak for yourself,” Kylo muttered from the corner of the room. He had been stripping himself layer by layer of his clothes for at least a full minute. The coatrack beside him was now covered in various black garments and he _still_ was covered from the neck down.

“Did you think you were going on an expedition to Antarctica?” Finn asked dryly, watching his rival move over to sit beside Rey on the couch. Kylo just rolled his eyes.

“It’s good to be prepared.”

“So what were you guys doing before we got here?” Rey asked, looking between Poe and Finn with a bright smile. Both of them got a little tense, but Finn was especially transparent in his embarrassment as he quickly averted his eyes. Rey raised a brow with interest. “Oh, did we interrupt something…?”

Poe spoke up quickly, deciding to spare him the humiliation. “We were just playing a game.”

Rey's eyes lit up at that. "Ooh, what kind of game?"

"Well, we were going to play truth or dare," Finn said. "You up for it?"

"Sure, I haven't played that in forever!" She glanced over to Kylo, who wasn't even trying to hide his disdain from them.

"Uh...no thanks, I'm not a child."

"He just turned thirty today, he thinks he's too mature for such things," Rey whispered to her friends, looking back at Kylo with a teasing smile. 

"Thirty? Damn..." Finn snorted, shaking his head. "Wait, I got a good dare for him."

A cold smile formed on Kylo's lips as he slowly turned his head back towards the group. "Then I pick truth."

"You are too predictable. I didn't even have a dare, I just knew you'd pick the opposite of whatever I said," Finn snickered. "So, truth. How many of your students have you tried to sleep with?"

Rey choked on her drink. Poe gave Finn a warning look, but seemed like he secretly wanted to know the answer as well. 

Lip curled with agitation, Kylo leaned forward to answer the question. " _None_." 

"Rey counts as at least one."

"She's not even my student anymore," he snapped back, but did not openly deny the other part of the accusation. The blood started to rise in his cheeks as he dug his fingers into the couch to keep from swinging at Finn. But the other man kept pushing him anyway. 

"Yeah, but she still was when you started essentially stalking her, and you're a full decade older than her, I mean it's a _little_ \--"

"Okay, my turn now!" Rey interjected, taking a large gulp of her beer. "I pick truth too."

Apparently wanting to ease the tension as well, Poe took her up on it, asking her a fairly innocent, typical question about when she had her first drink (she had been 17). From then on, there was not much disturbance, since an unspoken rule seemed to form, stating that Finn and Kylo would not ask each other any more truths or give each other dares. They both ended up being tormented enough by the whimsies of Rey and Poe. Eventually, it was Rey's turn again, and Kylo had a question for her.

"Are you a virgin?"

She scoffed, deciding to deflect. "Why do you care?"

"It's the nature of the game, Rey," said Poe. "Just answer it."

Letting out a deep sigh, she leaned back against the couch. "Yes, okay? I'm picky. So what?"

The smallest of smiles pulled at the corner of Kylo's lips as he let his gaze travel over her slowly. "I knew it." 

"It's your turn, so what about you?" Rey asked him--a little too eagerly. Poe and Finn glanced at each other with confused expressions. 

"That's not how it works," Kylo mused, shifting on the couch to face her. "I'm picking dare."

She sighed with annoyance. "Then I _dare_ you to tell me whether or not you're a virgin."

"Come on, Rey, at his age....what do you think?" Poe reminded her. "There's no way."

Finn looked off, muttering under his breath, "Eh, with that personality, I can believe it..."

"Hey, dipshit, I can _hear_ you," Kylo snarled before turning back to Rey. "And I'm _not_ answering this damn question, so pick something else or skip me completely!"

The other three glanced between each other with wide eyes, before Poe finally announced what they all had been thinking. "Oh my God. He _is_ a virgin."

"Shut _up!_ "

Thankfully, the rest of the evening involved more neutral activities, such as watching Poe's collection of weird kung-fu movies from the 80's, and trying to find anything edible in the kitchen to eat for dinner--aside from the several beers they had gone through. Before long, it was pretty late. Rey had almost fallen asleep on the couch more than once. 

 

"Just wondering, how long are you guys staying?" Finn asked with a yawn, but before they could answer, Poe chimed in.

"You're welcome to sleep over. I mean, there _is_ a snow storm outside."

"Well, if you really wouldn't mind...we'd love to."

Kylo nudged her in the side, hissing through clenched teeth. "Rey...please..."  
Huffing with annoyance, she turned to him, a hand on her hip. "Okay, would you rather walk back at night, in a blizzard, back to your parents?" 

He said nothing. Meanwhile, Finn glanced around at everyone with uncertainty. 

"So uh...where's everyone going to sleep?"

"Since you guys are the guests, I'm fine with one of the couches," Poe shrugged. "You can fight out the rest." 

Kylo immediately called dibs on the bed, which of course, did not surprise anyone. That settled it for Finn, who was not about to even sleep in the same _room_ as him, and decided on the loveseat next to the window. Thus, Rey had the choice of sharing the queen-sized bed with Kylo, or sleeping on the floor. With much reluctance, she headed into the bedroom. Kylo trailed after her, grinning from ear to ear. 

"Must be a birthday miracle. See, I knew you would end up having to sleep with me one way or another..." 

Stopping in her tracks to glare at him, it was all Rey could do not to slap that infuriating smirk off his face. "You stay on your side, I stay on mine. You got it?"

* * *

 

It was past midnight, and the cabin was almost pitch black. Someone was snoring, but Poe wasn’t sure who it was. He thought he was the only one still awake when he heard someone sneaking over to crouch beside him on the couch.

“Poe?” Finn whispered. “You awake?”

“Yeah.”

“Are they asleep?”

“I think so,” Poe whispered back.

“Good.”

It was hard to tell who moved first. Their lips connected in the darkness, soft and hesitant at first, but the kiss slowly grew more insistent as they pulled each other closer. With his experience, it took a lot for Poe to have his breath taken away by a mere kiss—but he’d been waiting for this for _so long._ He thought this was all a lost cause, that he was just torturing himself with this stupid crush, that Finn was just a confused straight guy who would never be more than his friend. But now it was finally happening.

Of course, they couldn’t go very far since they weren’t exactly alone. As they pulled away from each other, Poe couldn’t stop smiling. From the sound of Finn’s shaky breathing, it seemed like he’d enjoyed himself too.

After a few moments of silence, Finn was the first to speak again. “What…what does this mean, now?”

“Don’t think about it,” Poe murmured, pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek. “We’ll figure it out later, when we’re _really_ alone.”

Finn let out a soft whine. “It’s not like I can just go back to sleep after that…”

“I know…neither can I.” Poe peered out in the darkness towards the half-opened bedroom door, and a smirk spreading across his features. “I think I have an idea to distract you.”

“What…?”

“Shh…come with me.” He got up off the couch as quietly as he could, padding over to the kitchen area. Standing on one of the chairs to reach the door of the highest pantry, he started searching around in there, using his phone as a flashlight. “It’s in here somewhere…ah.”

He pulled out a Tupperware container full of markers, scissors, tape, and other various items that could be used for mischief and mayhem. 

“Too bad we don’t have shaving cream...”

“Wait, you’re really going to do this?” Finn hissed. “Do you want me to get my ass kicked?”

“Relax, I’ll protect you from him if he goes psycho on us,” Poe said, holding out the container towards Finn as he stepped down from the chair.

“I’m not just worried about him, Rey could kick my ass too.” Finn muttered, but took the box anyway.  
“Well, we won’t do anything that isn’t easily reversible then.”

Thinking over it a moment, Finn showed a hint of a smile. “Actually...we may be able to find shaving cream after all.”

Going back into the den, towards the door where everyone’s belongings had somehow accumulated, Finn pulled out a small black bag from the pile. “I’ve never seen the man with even a hint of stubble,” he explained in a hushed tone as he rifled through the bag. “I’m sure he brought some with him, even if it was just for one night.”

Grabbing something that felt like a can, Finn raised it up to the light from Poe’s phone only to cover his mouth to keep from laughing. “He brought _face scrub_...!"

"Hey, _I_ use face scrub. From time to time. Maybe not as expensive as _that_ brand," Poe shrugged as he looked at the container. "Can't diss a man for caring about his appearance."

Finn rolled his eyes at that, clearly unimpressed. But he found what he was looking for soon enough, and now armed with shaving cream and markers, they crept into the bedroom towards the sleeping pair. "Let's do this..."

* * *

Rey awoke in the strangest of circumstances. For one thing, Kylo had apparently broken the 'you stay on your side, I'll stay on mine' rule, and was now wrapped around her like a python trying to suffocate its prey. Her groggy mind did not have long to process this turn of events before she realized there was something weird on her face. Reaching a hand up to touch it, her jaw dropped as she felt wet foam all over not just her face, but her hair as well. Then, looking down at her arms, she saw _someone_ had been doodling on her skin with a permanent marker. There was also a little note left for her on the back of her right hand: _"Sorry, we couldn't resist "_

Roughly pushing back against the creature that had attached himself to her in the night, she tried desperately to wriggle free of his embrace, eventually falling off the bed and onto the floor with a loud thud. Only then was she able to see the damage inflicted on Kylo. It was admittedly, much worse.

"Oh wow..."

Kylo slowly came to consciousness with a low groan, reaching around as if trying to find Rey before he lazily opened one eye to look down at her from the edge of the mattress. "What are you doing down--what is that all over your face?"

"What's on _yours?_ " she snickered, pointing at him. He touched his cheek, only for something sweet and gooey to stick to his fingers. Now looking adequately alarmed, he jumped off the bed, rushing into the bathroom to see himself in the mirror.   
_"WHAT THE FUCK?!"_

Rey could barely control her laughter, watching him try desperately to scrub the honey and the obligatory penis drawing from the side of his face.

"They're dead, they're fucking **dead....**!" He had a long way to go before he would be clean. His hair was matted down with honey and shaving cream, and there were more lewd drawings and insults where that came from, marking all the way down his arms. There was even one on his foot that simply said _"Happy birthday, douchebag."_

At about this time, the commotion Kylo was causing had woken up Finn and Poe, who now burst in to see the result of their devious deeds. Rey wasn't exactly amused about what they'd done to _her_ , but she couldn't help but howl with laughter at Kylo. By now, most of his face and arms were beet red from rubbing his skin raw, trying to get rid of the markings. Tearing his shirt off, he slammed the door to the bathroom, just before the shower started running.

"Hey wait, I need to wash off too!" Rey whined as she went over to the door, jiggling the knob only to find it locked. Finn raised a brow. 

"You going to get in there with him?"

"I was _never_ \--" She flushed as she remembered Finn didn't know the story about the nurse assuming they'd been showering _together_ when she'd slipped. " _No_ , I'm just using the sink."

There was a small click from the other side of the door, and she tried the knob again, now able to step inside and start cleaning herself up at the vanity. From behind the opaque shower curtain, Kylo continued to voice his complaints. Loudly.

"I can't believe this, this is so childish and--I hope you realize, your friends are _assholes_...!"

"Well, so are you," she snorted, using a rag from under the sink to get rid of the shaving cream. Kylo kept on cursing and muttering anyway, until the stream from the shower cut off, and he reached a hand out to find a towel. Rey turned away, not sure if he was going to step out to dry off or not. 

"I'm decent, alright, you can turn around," he sighed. "See if I missed anything."

Turning to look over him, she pretended not to notice the flat plane of his abdomen, or how low the towel hung at his hips, or how the water droplets clinging to his skin somehow made her mouth dry. Nope, none of that was of any importance to _her_...

 _Damn it all, he has one of those bloody...what are they called...that V thing..._ she thought with frustration, averting her eyes from his Adonis belt and circling around to look at him from a different angle. What she saw was a good distraction.

"Yeah, you missed one."

"Where?"

She bit her lip to keep from giggling as she directed him over towards the mirror. "It's on your back..."

Across his shoulder blades, bright red marker scrawled out the words: "CRY-LO REN"

* * *

 Needless to say, Kylo left the cabin as soon as possible, stomping off into the woods. Having to say goodbye to Finn and Poe in a rush to keep up with him, Rey followed soon after. But he was in store for even more misery once he returned to his parents: it was _bonding_ time.

“Why does Dad want to do this so badly? He’s never been fishing in his life!”

“I guess that’s why he wants to do it.” Leia shrugged, crossing her arms as she looked over at her husband and her brother, who were struggling to put together a bag full of fishing gear. “But don’t ask me, Luke’s the one who talked him into it.”

Kylo rolled his eyes. “Okay, but why do _I_ have to join in on this faux macho bullshit? Bringing me is just going to ruin it for everyone.”

“Because this is apparently the only way faux macho men can bond with each other, so just do it, alright?” Leia sighed with exasperation. “You and your father have barely said a word to each other since you’ve been living with us. It wouldn’t kill you to spend some time with him.”

Trudging off, Kylo muttered under his breath. “No, but it might kill him….”

About an hour later, Luke had lead him and Han off into the woods to find what the old hermit swore was the best fishing spot around. Not that it really mattered, Luke was the only one with any experience to catch anything. Kylo thought they had arrived when they reached the river, but seeing as they were standing on the edge of a cliff, it would take a lot of fishing line to even touch the water from their height.

“Over here!” Luke waved them over downhill until they reached one end of a rope bridge, stretching about thirty feet over the water to the other side. “The fish are smart, see. They know people are usually at the water’s edges, so they stay towards the middle of the stream,” he explained, walking out onto the bridge and stopping at the middle. “So, you’re most likely to catch one from right here.”

Kylo looked at the rope bridge skeptically, barely putting a foot on it and seeing how much it creaked and swayed. “Did you build this yourself?”

Luke chuckled. “No, why would you think that?”

“It doesn’t look safe.”

 “Just get on the damn bridge, Ben,” Han snapped, walking past him to join Luke. Glowering at both of them, Kylo hesitated only a moment further before stepping out onto the wooden planks, gripping onto the ropes at either side of him for dear life. But the bridge wasn’t quite as shaky now, with the weight of two grown men holding it steady in the middle. Still, he was half expecting it to break under the weight of a third.

Thankfully, it was sturdier than it looked, and held them all the way through Luke’s demonstration on how to fish. Han watched him carefully, trying to mimic him down to exact movements, but got easily frustrated when the line got tangled—which was a lot. Meanwhile, Kylo was trying to figure out a way to tie his fishing pole to the rope railing so he didn’t have to actually hold it while he stubbornly ignored the other two.

After about the first half hour, he asked if he could leave yet. “No, you’re being rude,” his father had hissed at him. Another hour later, and Kylo tried to quietly sneak off. This didn’t go unnoticed, and he was stopped pretty quickly. He thought he was doomed to spend an eternity in this bizarre fishing limbo, when he suddenly came up with an idea.

“Hey. Dad.”

Han, distracted by some inside joke with Luke, didn’t turn around. Kylo kept pestering him like a small child anyway.

“ _Dad._ Hey Dad, look.”

Sighing with annoyance, Han finally turned to look at him. “ _What_?”

Kylo pointed downwards. “Look in the water.”

Looking over the side of the bridge, Han’s eyes narrowed as he searched the water. “I don’t see anything…what are you talking about?”

“It’s a huge fish. Seriously, it was like five feet long. I think it went slightly under the bridge, you’ll have to lean over to see it.”

Testing the flimsiness of the rope ‘railing’, Han scoffed and shook his head. “Are you crazy? I’m going to fall off!”

“No you aren’t, just do it,” Kylo insisted, reaching out to push him forward. “ _Trust me_.”

As soon as Han was standing at the very edge of the planks, Kylo glanced over to make sure Luke wasn’t watching him. He then grabbed onto the rope for safety before sharply shifting his weight to the same side as his father, tilting the bridge just enough to make Han lose his footing and fell over the edge. There was a terrified scream, then a heavy splash below.

“What the hell did you do?” Luke gasped, looking over the edge with wide eyes.  
“It was an accident, I swear!” This was partially true. Kylo hadn’t known for sure whether or not Han would actually fall off, but it was immensely satisfying to see that he did. To him, the old man had it coming for a long time.

Meanwhile, Luke had taken off his jacket and boots, preparing to jump into the icy water after his friend. Going off the edge with a graceful dive, he cut through the surface of the water with the smallest of splashes. The current of the river was very slow, so it was not long before he reached Han, who had been flailing around in the water and shouting for help. He was able to swim, but just barely.

Rushing off the bridge and skirting the edge of the cliff, Kylo finally found a spot where he could climb down to the river’s edge. He took only a few careful steps down the steep angle before slipping in the mud and tumbling to the ground. He’d rolled over a few rocks on the way down, and groaned with pain as he slowly got to his feet, limping over to where Luke was now pulling a shivering Han out of the water.

“You okay, Dad?” Kylo called out, having to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing.

 With chattering teeth, Han turned to give him a look of death. “F-fuck…y-y-you…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry, I’m Satan. I knew what I had to do, and somehow found the strength to do it. Mainly because Han didn’t actually die this time. I'm also pretty sure I should just call this fic "a series of unfortunate events...but mostly happening to just kylo". Anyway, as always, reviews are appreciated. Thanks for reading!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long! And sorry it seems kinda short, but I hope something at the end makes up for it ;)

The trip back from Luke’s was long and quiet, aside from the occasional, shallow conversation between Rey and Leia. Seeing as he was not being strung behind the car by his ankles, Kylo figured he was off the hook. But after settling back into the house and changing into more comfortable clothes, he went out into the living room to find everyone sitting there as if waiting for him.

Glancing between his parents and Rey, he narrowed his eyes, already having a _very_ bad feeling about this. “What is this…?”

“This is a long overdue intervention.”

He scoffed. “Why? I’m not on drugs…” That they knew of, anyway.

Leia stared at him blankly. “You pushed your father into the river, Ben.”

“I didn’t push him, he fell.”

“It was below freezing, and he can’t swim!”

“I can too swim! Just not very well…” Han muttered in his defense. Kylo glanced between them before sighing heavily.

“Are you serious? You do realize I don’t actually want either of you _dead,_ right…? If Luke didn’t go ahead and do it, I would have jumped in after him, I swear.”

Leia waved her hand dismissively. “Whatever you would or wouldn’t have done, we won’t ever know. But you should know that it is a _privilege_ that we’ve taken you back in our home after everything, and your idea of repaying us has been to make our lives as difficult as possible—“

“So are you going to kick me out or what?” he sighed, already bored with this conversation. “Because I’d rather not stretch this out longer than it needs to be if you are.”

“No, we aren’t kicking you out, but god help me, you are _going_ to get your shit together!” Leia snapped, glaring at him from across the room. Everyone was silent for a long moment, as was typical when the family matriarch used this particular tone.

“I _do_ have my shit together,” Kylo finally responded. “I’m not on the street—thanks for that—and I officially have two jobs again, starting tomorrow. Pretty soon, I’ll be able to move out and we can all be happily separated again…”

Slapping a hand against her knee, Leia stood up sharply. “That’s just it, Ben. You never even bothered to tell us why you left in the first place. I mean, you still won’t even use your real name--!”

“You know why.”

“No, I don’t!” She stepped forward, appearing almost desperate through the anger and frustration. “Please, just help me understand. If we did something wrong…”

At this point, Kylo started backing away, shaking his head firmly. “No, no, I’m _not_ doing this with you, I’m a fucking adult. We did this family therapy shit before, remember? You didn’t want to hear about what you did wrong then, and you don’t now.”

Clearly not done with him yet, Leia followed after. “If you’re such an adult, we _will_ kick you out if you can’t even talk to us!”

“See, there it is,” Kylo said with a humorless laugh. “You’re very good at ultimatums, consequences, guilt-tripping. Talking? Fixing things? Not so much.”

He sighed and looked back at Rey, who hadn’t dared to interfere even though she’d technically been invited to this ordeal. “You still won’t let me live with you?”

“Not a chance.”

Kylo stared at her indignantly. “I would let you live with me if I had an apartment.”

“Key word: apartment,” she pointed out. “Not a dorm with a single bed—“

“I think we’re getting off-subject,” Han finally interrupted. “I don’t particularly want to do this either, so if you aren’t going to kick him out _right now_ , then why don’t we all just tough it out until he can afford to move?”

“That’s what I said…” Kylo muttered under his breath, for once agreeing with his father. Meanwhile, Leia slowly turned away from everyone. There was a long moment of awkward silence before her shoulders started shaking as choked noises escaped her.

“Now look what you did.”

* * *

 

Aside from Leia keeping herself firmly locked in the back room, Kylo’s first day at La Résistance did not go as terribly as expected. Obviously, he’d done similar work before so there was not much of an adjustment. Everyone seemed to make a silent agreement that he would keep to making drinks and not actually interacting with any customers, while a cheerier face such as Poe’s would handle the register. This was especially wise considering what month it was, since the customers tended to pile up and had attitudes in direct opposition with the good-hearted intentions of the season. It took someone with the patience of a saint to deal with them. Thankfully, no one complained about the fact that La Résistance just used snowflake themed cups instead of something more Christmas-centric.

Rey started worrying about gift-giving pretty quickly. Her friends had thrown her that amazing surprise party, so she felt it was only fair to get them something for the holiday. And after all that Leia and Han had done for her, it would be downright rude not to find a way to pay them back—especially since it was not just her that they had to deal with this past month.

That was another thing. Under any under circumstances, it wouldn’t have even crossed her mind to give something to Kylo. But they’d been living under the same roof. He’d gotten flowers for her birthday (bad idea though it was), gotten a black eye for her, and through many awkward events, had seen her naked and slept in the same bed as her. Honestly, she wasn’t sure what to think about him anymore. He definitely wasn’t an enemy or an acquaintance, but he didn’t exactly fall into the ‘friend’ category either. She’d never had weird sex dreams about her friends.

She wanted to keep thinking she’d never give him what he wanted. Surely, her standards were much higher than dating her unstable trainwreck of a former teacher, who was also ten years her senior and was deeply unappreciative of the only thing she’d ever wanted in life: a family. But it was getting harder to brush off the way he looked at her. Sometimes it was sad and longing, like some pathetic lost puppy that just wanted her attention, and at other times it was a lot less innocent than that. Sometimes, they’d just be working together, or at his parents’ house making dinner, and he’d give her a glance that lingered just a little too long and made her face burn. That, and since the incident at the cabin, she couldn’t forget what he looked like underneath his shirt. She couldn’t keep ignoring it anymore. He was attractive. _Hot,_ even. Was it really such a crime to admit that?

So, she decided maybe she didn’t have to sign herself up to seriously date him. Maybe, she could just experiment.

That’s what Rey told herself as she got up out of bed one night. She squinted in the dark as she checked the time on her phone, seeing it was almost one. Everyone had to be asleep except her. Swallowing thickly, she mentally tried to pump herself up, pushing away all thoughts of potential consequences. Like how awkward the next morning would probably be. No, that did not matter now. She was sick of being the cautious, boring friend who never dated or had one night stands or did anything even remotely wild. She didn’t exactly want to be on Kylo’s level of crazy, but she could stand to be a little bolder.

Tiptoeing towards the bathroom door that adjoined their rooms, she pushed it open with a small creak. The other door was closed, but light drifted in from the other side. He was still awake? Rey thought to knock, but decided against it, turning the knob and stepping into his room quietly. The small lamp at his nightstand was the only thing illuminating the space. He was lying on his bed with a book in hand, seeming to be slowly slipping out of consciousness when her presence roused him from his sleep. Sitting straight upright, he blinked in confusion before rubbing his eyes.

“Hey…” he greeted her, but it was more of a question than anything else.

“Hey. I um…I didn’t know you read,” she suddenly commented. Looking everywhere except at him, she started to instantly regret her decision to come here. _I can’t do this, I’m not cut out for this sort of thing...God, I’m in my bloody pajamas, not even anything remotely sexy…_

“Yeah, occasionally.” He shrugged, putting the book down on the nightstand. Stretching his arms behind his head, he slowly stood, still seeming confused by her. “Can I…help you with something?”

She bit her lip, glancing over him before quickly shaking her head. “No, I just…nevermind,” she muttered. “I just couldn’t sleep and was bored, that’s all.”

He didn’t seem convinced, looking over her suspiciously. “You aren’t here to talk about that poor excuse for an intervention or some shit, are you?”

She could almost laugh at that. He had no idea. “No, that’s not it.”

“Then what is it?”

There was a long pause. But like a coward, she just shook her head again, now backing away. “Like I said, nothing. I’ll just try to sleep, sorry for bothering you,” she started to mumble, turning to go back to her room. But something about her demeanor must have given her away. Because a second later, she felt his hand pulling her back by the wrist, and as she stumbled into him, his lips were suddenly crashing down on hers.

_Holy fuck, holy fuck, holy fuck…._ It was the most intelligent thing her mind managed to come up with as he was kissing her, but her body wasn’t cooperating, just freezing up where she should have been kissing him back. A second or two later, he quickly pulled away, dark eyes wide and darting around as if extremely embarrassed.

“I misread that, didn’t I?”

“No, no, I— “, she stumbled to explain, but by this point, her actions could finally catch up with her mind. So she answered by grabbing Kylo by the back of his neck and pulling him down to kiss him again. She’d expected it to be either shy and innocent, or of a purely sexual nature, but it ended up being something in between. His mouth was soft and hot, kissing her like it was the damned end of the world, but he didn’t seem to know what to do with his hands. They wandered with awkwardly light touches from her neck to her back to her waist, seemingly unsure of what she would be alright with. It was obvious he hadn’t much experience (if any at all), but then again, neither did she.

Rey was the first to pull away, needing to breathe. She almost felt dizzy. For the longest time, neither of them said anything, the air around them seeming to change. It hadn’t even been that much but everything was different now.

“That was a lot better than I was imagining,” he finally said, eyes searching hers as if nervously wondering what she thought of it.

“Yeah…” she agreed. Then, a small grin tugged at the corner of her lips. “Wait, how long were you imagining that for?”

“Since you were in my class. Pretty early in the semester.”

“Seriously?”

“What?” he shrugged. “It’s the truth, you were fucking hot.”

“I was your _student._ ”

“And? It’s not like being underage. I refuse to feel guilty.”

She rolled her eyes, but secretly felt a little flattered that he had wanted her for this long. Never having such a long-lasting crush in her life, she could only imagine what that had been like for him. Especially since her own attraction towards him had only started developing maybe a month earlier.

“So…” he continued, voice lowered again as he made a passing glance towards the door, as if worried they were going to be caught or something. “What does this mean, now?”

“I have no idea.”


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, this chapter is PAINFULLY short. I just wanted to squeeze something out since today is Rogue One day! Hopefully, since it's Christmas break I'll finally have time for more updates. Hope you enjoy this tidbit.

It was almost impossible for Kylo to continue pretending to just feel casual happiness over last night’s events. He was fucking _ecstatic._ This was all he ever wanted for the past few months, and _she_ had come to _him_ for it. Rey had stayed in his room for a little while, kissing and touching him in sudden bouts of bravery that quickly dwindled back down to shy distance. It was as if she couldn’t make up her mind whether she wanted to do more than just make out like awkward, inexperienced teenagers trying not to wake up his parents. Which was, essentially what they were at the moment. His childhood bedroom was not exactly the ideal setting for what he wanted to do. Eventually, she said she was tired and he convinced her to stay with him instead of going back to her own room. They had, after all, slept in the same bed before. But the next morning, she had somehow disentangled herself from his embrace and disappeared before he awoke.

He expected to find her downstairs, but only saw his father in the kitchen and his mother in the living room. As usual, he tried to avoid them as much as possible while searching for Rey, but eventually had to ask Leia where she went.

“I don’t know,” she shrugged, turning another page in her book. “The shop doesn’t open for another couple of hours today.”

His panicked mind immediately assumed Rey regretted last night and had just jumped ship and went back to spend the rest of the holidays alone in her dorm room. But she’d never leave without at least telling his parents goodbye. 

Muttering a word of thanks, he was about to head back upstairs when Leia spoke up again. “She seemed a little…dodgy. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that, would you?” she asked, looking at him pointedly. He knew what that look meant. No doubt she thought he had said or done something horrible to Rey. Of course, everything was his fault, as usual.

 “Oh, I don’t know, it might have something to do with her feeling guilty about last night. But that’s just my guess,” he responded with a bitter smile before climbing the stairs back to his room. Before this, he never would’ve even given anyone an implication about what happened—for Rey’s sake. He would’ve waited to see if _she_ wanted others to know. But groundless accusations and suspicions always had a way of making him want to prove people wrong. Even if they probably would lead to even worse consequences later on.

* * *

 

Rey was, in fact, avoiding him. All she wanted to do was go to work—without Kylo there, obviously—and just forget about what had happened. It wasn’t that she regretted it completely. In the moment, it had been fantastic, awkwardness and all. She had even considered sleeping with him just for the hell of it. But no matter how much she’d wanted to be cool and casual, it just wasn’t her style. And unfortunately for her, it didn’t seem to be his style, either. The whole problem with trying to have a no-strings-attached fling with him was that he was _already_ attached. And she knew he’d be trying his damnedest to drag her down with him.

So now, she was running away. For a while, she just walked around the neighborhood aimlessly, telling herself she needed the exercise. But eventually, the frigid cold started to get to her and she knew she needed to get inside somewhere. So, jogging with her hands stuffed in her pockets and a scarf wrapped around her nose and mouth, she made her way over to the nearest shop in town. There was no way she was going back to the Solo’s just yet.

It was just a typical little gift shop, already bustling with people trying to get last-minute Christmas gifts. Which reminded her, she needed to do that as well. It would be a good distraction. Thankfully, she had brought her wallet with her, though her budget was limited.

After busying herself in that one store for an hour, followed by a trip to a few other shops close by, she managed to get small gifts for almost everyone on her list. She found an elegant, gold and turquoise ring for Leia, a simple gift card for Han (he was pretty difficult to buy for), several boxes of Finn’s favorite candies, and an orange and white sweater for Poe (she’d tried her hardest to find one with a corgi on it, but to no avail).

There was only one person left. And ever since she’d even started worrying about gift-giving, her anxiety about Kylo hadn’t changed. They weren’t friends, they weren’t enemies. They were in this weird in-between where she didn’t know if she should give him a gift at all. Then again, if she gave his parents one and didn’t bother with him, that would look extremely rude no matter their particular feelings towards each other. Plus, he’d be sure to throw a fit about the unfairness of it all….which would ruin Christmas. No, Rey couldn’t have that. She _had_ to get him something, if only to spare his mother the headache. At least that was what she told herself.

She returned back at the house, arms full of bags, just an hour before it was time to go to work. “I’m back!” she announced, pushing the door shut with her elbow as she set the bags down on the steps. The whole family was in the kitchen, apparently in the middle of something. It didn’t seem to be an all out argument, as only Kylo seemed angry. And that was basically his default setting, anyway.

“What were you guys talking about?” Rey asked, a bit eager to ‘act normal’ and avoid any direct talk between herself and Ren. Unfortunately, he was the first to answer.

“Oh, just how my father traumatized me as a small child and how hysterical they think it was…”

Leia rolled her eyes and groaned. “He dressed up as Santa for you, lots of fathers do that…it was very sweet of him--”

“He snuck into my room in the middle of the night and said I was so bad that year, he was going to bury me in coal. Not just give me coal, _bury_ _me alive_ in it. It was terrifying. He might as well have dressed up as Krampus.”

“I should’ve done that instead, it would’ve been funnier,” Han muttered from the table, not looking up as he continued flipping through his newspaper.

Now seeming to notice the bags on the stairs that Rey had brought in, Kylo’s eyes lit up slightly as a smirk spread across his face. “Did you get something for me?”

Rey narrowed her eyes before turning her back on him and heading to her room. “You wish….”


End file.
